Monday, December 31, 2007

Move on asstard!!!

So my mom and Lori told me that they both received calls from dip shit telling them happy holidays. Ok, first off, who the fuck calls out of the blue their ex's relatives around the holidays? Doesn't he have his own family to deal with? Oh yeah, he does, but he doesn't give them the time of day. Instead it's more important to try and keep tabs on me almost 2 years AFTER I dumped him. Seriously, does this strike anyone as being a little psychotic? I don't go around calling his family or his coworkers or anyone he knows. What a douche bag! Anyway, I'm guessing he still keeps tabs on me via myspace or something, so here's a not-so-subtle message. Move on asstard. We're not getting back together. Ever. You were a douche then and you'll probably be a douche till you die. Jesse and I are married now with a son on the way, and there's no way in hell I'd ever leave what I have now to go back to what I didn't want back then. You're a fat loser and no one wants you. Stop talking to my family and get on with your life. I got on with my life, why can't you. There's a reason you're almost 40 and still single living in that shit hole in Malibu. FYI, you're a disgrace to Malibu. When people see you at parties they wonder who invited the fat guy in shorts and sandals in the winter. You're not cool. The only people who would remotely find you interesting are people online who have no idea what your pathetic little life in your pathetic little room with your pathetic little records on your pathetic little computer are really like. Why not try and buy some friends or a life with Daddy's inheritance money??? Till then, stay the fuck out of mine... by that I mean QUIT TALKING TO MY FAMILY!!! Do you think they don't talk to me? I know this shit. Give it up ass wipe!

That's all I got.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

The Lowdown On Christmas

Let's see where do I start...

Friday morning they had this breakfast shebang for us at work. Then after that, I got picked up by the husband and hung out at home for a while before he took me to the airport, where I was dropped off and took a plane down to LAX. The plane was really crappy in my mind, a little Horizon shuttle, that felt like the wings were gonna break off when it was hitting the air. I got in and was lucky enough to get the Flyaway at 9:30 and get into Van Nuys around 10:15 give or take. From there, we made a pit stop to Tommy's. And then I went to bed.

Saturday was spent at Sea World. Not much to say there. Ray rays. Mu mus. Lots of walking. Fudge. Yeaaaaahhhhh. Long drive home. I peed every two seconds and it was pissing Lori off. On the way home we made a pit stop in Carl's Jr. in this total scumbag area cos I really had to pee and I was hungry. Then, it was back to home and off to bed.

Sunday we met with Danielle and had breakfast at Millies. Then we went to the mall. I got all sorts of new preggo clothes. Then we came home, wrapped presents, got a pizza and did the Christmas thing... opening presents, etc. Then it was off to bed.

Monday I went to my grandma's house and met up with some old time family members I haven't seen in ages and a day. Had some German food and then had to go to the Flyaway to go back to LAX to get home in time for Christmas. They were all out of Flyaway busses so there was some other bus. Normally, they ask what flight you're taking so they know what terminals to stop at. This guy didn't. I didn't know what terminal to get off at so I asked him and he was like "Figure it out." No one knew what terminals they were supposed to get off at and he was complaining and finally was like "There's 60 something airlines out here, I don't know which terminals to stop at!" He was a total prick with a David Bowie haircut and sweet ass aviator glasses. What a shame.

I eventually got my plane and flew home. The guy sitting in front of me looked like Cousin Larry on Perfect Strangers and his friend had a silver fox mullet. The guy sitting across from me had these beat up ass old white tennis shoes with those early 90's curly cue laces and some Kirkland's Finest jeans. When I got off, there were these two old fatties waddling in front of me and they realized Jesse was waiting for me and they moved over and let me through and I met up with my Booger husband.

We got home and hung out for a few minutes and then went out to get our Christmas dinner supplies. Everywhere was closed. But we were lucky enough to hit Save Mart (ex-Albertson's) and managed to get there as they were the only grocery store open at that hour. It was 15 minutes till 9:00 and they were getting ready to close. We got our goods and headed out with our dinner supplies. Yay!

This morning, I woke up and uploaded our pictures from the weekend in LA. Then, Jesse woke up and we did our gift exchange. This is the first time Jesse's ever had to do any sorts of "gift shopping" for me, and I gotta admit, I'm so lucky he has really good taste and pays attention to things I like. He got me a preggo coat, this cute grey knit hoodie sweater, this green sweater I am totally enamored with, and some Bath & Body Works stuff, including new sleepy time bath salt. We had a nice morning.

Later Phil joined us and we went out to our shooting spot for some Christmas shooting. Some douchebags with their dirt bikes pulled up and were like "Are you guys shooting out here?" and we were like "Yeah." And they asked how long we were gonna be out and we said "a little while." They look at us and were like "Well, you're gonna fuck up our ride!" then they drove off. We weren't out there that much longer, maybe another 30 or 40 minutes and then we packed up. Just as we were getting inside the car, a sheriff pulls up. Jesse goes up to him to see what's up and the guy draws his gun on Jesse and then starts telling us to get out of the car, put our hands up, etc. We get the royal pat down, my pregnant self included, by a male officer, which Phil told me later legally they should have waited for the female officer to come out and pat me down. She came later. But preggo here, had to pee like crazy. Lulu was freaked out and wanted her mommy. They ran our plates, our drivers licenses, and the serials on the guns or something and of course everything comes up clean cos we're not breaking any laws. Basically guy officer was cool to us and was like "You're out 1000 yards like you're supposed to but, I only came out here cos someone called and complained." Basically, if it weren't for those mommy's boy douchebags complaining, the sheriff never would have come out. But officer dyke-o, who showed up later to "frisk" me, which she never did, pretty much came over and was being all smart assy with us about whether we had hunter's safety classes, or how we should go to the ranges and pay $6 to shoot. I inquired if the signs they have at the base of the area were outdated then, that is, the signs that say "shooting permitted 1000 yards, high power rifles 5000 yards." She said there was a "no shooting sign" and I corrected her on it and she was like "oh, that sign is old." I felt as if she didn't even listen to the question I asked. Then she tries to be cool with us talking about how they have been dealing with a lot of not safe issues lately with accidents of bikers, people drinking and doing drugs while biking, and how they found a dead body out here, etc. Last I recall that kinda info was supposed to be confidential information, but who knows. Anyway, they pretty much seemed pissed off to come out cos it was like a waste of their time to come out but they had to go cos someone called and it was their job. Jesse's new Glock had dirt on it as if the guy put it on the floor and he was really pissed. Anyway, we were pretty upset over all that.

We got home, the guys cleaned their guns, I made them some appetizers and then got started on dinner. I made our ham dinner and took a bath. Anyway, that's the end of Christmas. By this point my back hurts and I'm just tired.

Saturday, December 22, 2007


1. Last night I couldn't sleep. It was as if my sleep was some sort of progressive symphony of not-happening. Opening: I get into bed around 10:20 PM. I lay down on my side and hear thumping downstairs. Always with the thumping. Although this isn't thumping of building cabinets or redoing the piping, it's thumping like drumming along to some circus music. This goes on till about 10:40 PM and then stops. Finally I fall asleep. 12:00 AM, I am awaken again by severe pain in my abdomen. I attribute this again to growing pain, and maybe even the case of raspberries I ate earlier in the day, although it is low by the baby and not high in my tummy, so my theory of growing pains still holds true. I am on my side and hold my tummy. I whimper in pain. I look for my Tylenol and see it but don't open it because that requires too much work and that kind of work would just cause me even more pain, plus the pain that would follow from drinking the water. So I roll over into a crouched on my knees bending over position and lay that way for a while, hoping that the feeling of my tummy hanging down will ease the pressure and pain. And it did. The pain then traveled to my legs, which fell asleep from being in my squat pose. After that, I rolled back to my side and proceeded to go back to sleep. Around 3:30 AM, I woke up again, this time due to the fact I couldn't sleep from flying home. That stress of knowing I would spend the whole day practically doing nothing all till it was time to get on the plane. It wears me out. Finally I was able to sleep and in the end, I woke up slightly earlier, around 7:09AM instead of the now recent 7:45AM.

2. I get to work and we have breakfast. Not like oh someone brought in bagels or something, no I mean BREAKFAST. We got the pastries, the fruit salad, the southern style potatoes, bacon, sausage, and a lady making fresh omlets of your choice. I had an onion and cheese omlet. Then there was an array of breakfast drinks from orange juice, tomato juice, apple juice and the usual coffee and teas. There is quite the surplus of food left over and the sad part is it's getting trashed tonight. I may have Jesse take home some sausage and taters for him to enjoy tomorrow morning before he does my Christmas shopping.

3. The reality of the fact I am going home today has set in. I don't look forward to traffic, the 405 or the usual assortment of LA assholes, but I do look forward to going home, going to Sea World and seeing my ray rays, and for some reason I look forward to seeing the Izzy Ball Ball Ball. I just saw her holiday pictures and she looks so cute and fluffy. Plus I'm all excited about getting new clothes. Yay!

4. Jesse claims he's going to do my Christmas shopping this weekend. I'm so glad I got everyone's shopping done early. It was tricky for me to shop for Jesse without a car, but thanks to McGangsta and some others, I was able to collaborate his shopping and get it done and over with. There was no way in hell I'd just let him get one present to open for Christmas. Plus, thanks to the internet, a lot of my shopping was simplified and sent straight to my office. Sure, I may have had to pay for shipping costs, but if you ask me, being able to find that one hard to find thing that no one else seems to have, paying that shipping cost is worth it's weight in gold! On that note, I really do love online shopping. I've had very good luck with it over the years and will continue to use it for the purposes of being able to find those weird oddball rare presents or the hard to find things. Speaking of which, I am a little worried Jesse is doing my shopping this weekend. I know how much he hates shopping and malls and they are going to be swamped with lots of people and everything is gonna be all chaotic and amuck! Although I will be shopping Sunday with my mom so, yea, same difference...

That's all I got. I'm gonna eat my fruit bowl more and continue peeing like it's going out of style...

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

God gave me feet and a gun...

I've got this burnin', burnin' urine feelin' inside me... ok haha... Don't tell me you've never wanted to sing part of Tainted Love with those lyrics instead... But seriously, today I had burning pee which in my few years of living tells me something is wrong. So I decided to go to urgent care after work. Jesse worked late and I wasn't up to going right away so I got Couch .38 and walked down there a little later. I got there around 6:10 and was seen within a few minutes. I was the only one there, odd for someone who recalls urgent cares back home where there were usually 30 people and a 2 hour wait. Amazing. Anyway, after peeing in a cup (tangent: I wrote my name on the cup and wrote PEE CUP and drew a little picture of a smiley faced person peeing into a cup on it haha.) My results showed I did in fact have a urinary or bladder infection, same thing if you ask me, different thing if you ask a medical professional. Also, another weird thing, I lost 2 lbs, which weirds me out, cos since it's been a month or so since I've been to the preggo docs and instead of gaining weight, I lost. It weirds me out a little, but I know weight sometimes fluxuates, but doesn't it usually go gain weight, don't gain, gain? I don't think it's supposed to go gain, gain, lose...

Anyway, after that, I walk to the other side of the neighborhood and go to CVS and get my medication. I also pick up some other crap. Finally, around 9:00 I get home. Best part of this all is that I have insurance again. This means it only cost me $25 to see the doctor and my pee-fixer-pills were only $15. I know it still ran me $40 tonight, which means I had to cancel getting my hair colored Friday, it still beats paying that $150 I paid back in September when I didn't have insurance. Whew. It still hasn't started to snow yet, which disappoints me. But I'm happy other than that.

The end.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007


I've been having this anxiety lately of wondering if I'll be a good mom or if our son will like us. I keep worrying that I'll do something wrong or that our son will always cry cos he doesn't like us or something. I've also been afraid a lot lately. I guess it stems from the anxiety and turns to fear. I keep worrying that something will go wrong when I deliver. Like Jesse won't be around to take me to the hospital or something. I dunno. Then I'm worried because sometimes occasionally I feel little kicking and moving and sometimes I don't. I feel like we won't find a name. I really want to get a name picked out soon. I know we have 5 months but still, most people have a name by now. I hope we're not crappy parents. I hope everything works out. How the hell am I gonna know when to change the diaper if I can't smell!?

Child at heart

Whilst flipping through the channels to find something to watch tonight, I noticed some Christmas programming on. The movie: Olive, The Other Reindeer. I've never seen this show. I may have heard about it vaguely in the past. I'm surprised at how amused I was with it. I find it sad sometimes that I get enjoyment from simple kids programs. I know as an adult I should like comedies and dramas and action flicks geared towards adults with more sophisticated themes, but in all honesty, I do enjoy children's movies once in a while. I still take great pleasure in watching animated movies both for the simplistic sheer enjoyment factor and the craftsmanship that goes into making it. But more so for the entertainment purposes. Sue me. I think it's perfectly fine for an adult to watch a kid's movie occasionally for some lighthearted entertainment. Life is difficult as it is. Why complex it more with movies you need to think about?

Monday, December 17, 2007

Oh no, that shit ain't gonna fly...

We haven't had a downstairs neighbor since October when the tweakers got evicted/disappeared. I guess Friday night we got new downstairs neighbors. They're these Mexicans or some sorta Spanish speaking people. I'm already keeping my eye on them because of their shifty ways. They move in at night. Most people who move do it when it's bright outside. They decided it would be wise to move in around 8:30 PM. Ok, benefit of the doubt situation: maybe they work late. Saturday they are not visible all day. We go out and notice a makeshift leash: a fat shoe lace with a noose on one end and the other end is tied to the metal handrails. There is a bike on the floor and a bike chain, but they are not chained up. So they are quiet all day yesterday and then decide to do what sounds like redo the piping or something. Once again, after dark, there is more banging and thumping. They seem to enjoy doing home repairs or rearranging the furniture between the hours of 8:30 and 11:00 at night. Today, after I get back from church and grocery shopping, I come home and our floor starts to rattle. Then comes the onslaught of circus music. At first I think it's a car driving by. Then, I put my ear to the kitchen floor and hear it is indeed coming from below. Ok, there's rules to the Wilson place. You don't just show up here and act like you own the place. You're renting. You have no rights. You don't just move in on a Friday and start blasting your shit music two days later. You don't move in here and start putting all your crap out front. I'm waiting for the day my pregnant ass trips on one of their hazards on their front yard, which can potentially injure myself or my unborn child, and I can go after their asses as well as make a fuss to the property management that I might want to go after their property insurance to take care of my damages. They'll evict their asses faster than you can say AYE AYE AYE!!! For now there's only two of them in there. But I've seen it start off with two and then uncle Paco moves in with his lady and then she's pregnant and they're in between jobs and then the relatives from Juarez move in and suddenly there's 10 people living in a 1 bedroom apartment. Then you get all these shady ass visitors coming in. Next thing you know your car gets broken into or you have shit stolen from your car like tires or parts. These people better not be here long. They're gonna be a definite nuisance. As I've seen with the last 2 tenants of unit A, I'm guessing they're from another line of apartment hopping criminals. Yea... that shit ain't gonna fly in this place. Hopefully they don't make it past the winter. If that's the case I'm hoping Jesse and I can get a new place by the time our lease is up. I'll feel bad for leaving Mark and Debbie and Ralph behind but you know, you gotta do what you gotta do and we're not gonna raise a child in our living room. Unlike some people, we have standards and don't think that's ok...

Thursday, December 13, 2007


Yesterday when I got home from work there was a message from the nurses to call back and speak to them. Thoughts raced through my mind as to why they'd want me to call and speak to them that they couldn't just leave a message over the phone? Was it urgent? What could it be? Then I thought, maybe it had something to do with my triple test I had on Monday. But what the hell is that test for? I know they test something but what. So I look it up and it says it is used to rule out possibilities of birth defects. Granted when I see this my mind freaks out. The last thing any parent wants to learn is that their child might have down syndrome or that they need to do extra test because there's a possibility that their test was inconclusive. So I go to bed last night relatively freaked out. Then on top of all of that, I feel really sick. I have the most god awful upset stomach and to make matters worse, the Tot seems to know when my tummy hurts cos he thinks its funny to kick or hit it. Haha, good one, little guy. Mommy finds that hilarious. Especially around 2:00 AM on a work night. So after he decides that my stomach is no longer a fun thing to play with, I finally can get to bed. But by that point, my abdomen hurts... really bad. Like super cramping no matter which way I lay it still hurts painful. So after about an hour of flopping around trying to get comfy I finally fall asleep. Then I wake up and I throw up because I feel so sick from heartburn and pain and god knows what. It sucked. Then I finally got to work and called the nurses expecting the worst, but it was ok. All they wanted was for me to go see the lung specialist and let me know there was traces of yeast infection bacteria in my tests and to keep an eye out for that and if I get one it's ok for me to use Monistat. While the yeast infection thought annoys me I'm just glad my child is safe.

Do you know the muffin man? Or where he gets his supplies from?

There is a person who likes to get things from the trash. Because of this I have a theory to never trust anything they offer food wise. Well, this morning they come in and give a present of a blueberry muffin... which oddly is not blue, but a greyish greenish color. Very creepy. The look alone is enough to turn one off from eating it but knowing of their food gathering habits, that right there stops me. So it's sitting here at my desk, staring at me, creepy little thing. I fear eating it because it might make me sick.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Hello, Mr. Teague-Tot!!!

There will be another gunsmith in the family. With daddy's mechanical knowhow and mommy's artistic abilities, perhaps you will design the next great assault rifle... one can only dream...


How can anyone NOT like Dio?? I mean, seriously. He's like 100 million billion times cooler than Ozzy. Ever. He's almost as cool as Halford...operative word being almost. Every time I hear his short man of a voice, it makes me want to put on some sort of fur pelt and my fringed moccasin boots and get my sword and join him in his quest to battle mythical evil medieval creatures. One can only dream. My fantasy is that Dio dresses like that on an every day basis. Like he rolls up to Christmas dinner with the family like he's dressed in the Holy Diver video, or like drives to work in an early 90's Toyota or something and gets out and walks in and sits at a desk and checks his voicemails and emails in that outfit, or like goes grocery shopping like that. I mean, seriously, how great would that be???

I mean, come on... do you really need a visual aid??? Sigh... ooohkay...

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Incompetent Boob

Jesse was in the shower and called me over to ask me a question about some old archived photos I had on cds and upon my return back to the computer, I went to sit. I did this in my normal fashion of right leg in front of chair, left leg moved up at a 45 degree angle to tuck under my right leg, proceed to sit and thus be happy, right? Well something was off. Not sure what, but in my attempt to sit I went from the first part fine, but then upon the but to seat part, something went wrong. I instead of going backwards somehow went sideways and crashed into Jesse's computer. It was 3 part procession ending with me on the floor and in all sorts of pain. I assume bruises will appear tomorrow. From the depart, I hit the monitor and then trickled down to the tower and then down into the milk crate holding the tower and finally to the floor. Not fun. Afterwards, I felt completely stupid. I didn't know what happened, then when I realized what did, I didn't know why. I still don't know why. All I know is I feel like some sorta incompetent boob... and my back aches.


A few nights ago Jesse came home from work with these marinades. I thought they were like soak meat in this ruckus, cook, eat, yum. Nope. It's a super cool marinade! It has the sauce, comes with meat injectors and a spice topical cover. So I'm making the cajun marinade tonight on some chicken. Just injected it with some yummy love, let it soak in the marinade and sprinkled the spices on top and baked it. I can't wait to eat it in front of our Christmas tree! Although I gotta admit, our tree looks pretty sad cos there's no presents under it and no Christmas village. Oh well. Jesse says he's gonna do my Christmas shopping soon. Hopefully he utilizes the Christmas list I composed to help in figure out what to get. Poor guy seemed rather in the dark cos I'm one of those super hard to shop for people. I am fortunate enough to not have that problem with him as him and Lori are the two easiest to shop for people on earth. I know he will be a very happy Booger this year. Very happy. I can't wait! Anyway, back to cooking...

Friday, December 7, 2007

Good Morning Snow (Extended Version!)

Yesterday the weather reports said it was rumored to snow at night and in the morning. I question the accuracy of these reports as so far 90% of the time, the Reno meteorologist don't know crap and are way off. I went to bed around 11 something after looking outside to see no snow. As stated earlier, they said it would start around 9. All we had was rain and cold. Around 1 AM, Jesse rolled in for bed and said "Boogs, its starting to snow." Too tired, I smiled at the confirmation and went back to sleep. Around 5 AM the radio was going in and out and this threw me off and I woke up. Remembering Jesse's comment from 1 AM and the predictions from the weather channels and websites the days before, I thought, "Let's see if this snow ever came down." I go to the kitchen and look out the kitchen window and much to my surprise, the streets are WHITE!!! I go back to the warmth of our bed with Jesse and Lulu and tell him "I got my wish. It's white outside." A few seconds later, Jesse gets up and looks out our bedroom window. He tells me to open the blinds so he can get a better look. So at some 5 AM this is what we saw from our bedroom window:

Then, I get this idea to call my mom and tell her about our snow because she had the audacity to call me one time at 7 AM just to "talk", so I thought, why not. My dad got the phone and I had him wake my mom up. I told her it was white outside and then she left to pee or something and I hung up. After that, I got dressed and followed Jesse's suggestion of taking Lu outside so she can play in the snow before everyone wakes up.

We took her outside and this was her second experience with snow, but first experience with a larger amount of snow. Last Friday we were lucky to have 1", but today we had about 4".

She walked around trying to get her business done, because she did not want to be in the cold wet white stuff too long. Because of all the snow, she couldn't figure out where her normal bathroom places were, so she had to sniff out a place to go...

And then she went...

After that, we took a family picture in the snow around 5:30 AM and went back inside to eat breakfast and get all sorts of toasty.

I know Debbie will really love these pictures because it'll make her all sorts of homesick for New York. Don't worry Oso, you'll be home again :) On that note, I leave to make Jesse a bagel and say I love you Reno and your snow! I think at this rate I will get my white Christmas! :D


I always thought pugs were adorable but ever since we got Lulu she's pugged her way into our hearts. I've easily become drawn to pugs and pug culture. I want pug socks. I want pug salt & pepper shakers. I want pug cookie jars. I want anything pug. I love my pug!

Current Gripes and Compliments

1. I really like the soap in the bathroom at work. For the longest time there was only Purel and I hate that crap. Then, someone decided to buy us soap again and they got this milk & honey soap. It's so nice! It makes my hands feel soft and smooth and that's a huge pro since the weather up here is super dry and cold. Not super cold yet but very dry.

2. We won't be able to get a home when our lease is up. My credit isn't good enough. Technically if we save up and pay a lot of crap up it can be built up but for how long they check, we'll be better off waiting another year. On that note, I've been looking at larger apartments and townhouses. I found a nice townhouse for rent that's only $225 more than what we pay a month now. However, for what it is, it's a nice deal. Laundry on site, gated community, really nice interior, pets ok. So, hopefully when our lease is up or near being up we can submit an application to them or something. It would be nice to live somewhere with laundry on site. It'd be a lot easier than going to the lavandaria, I'll tell you that!

3. Last night were the JDRF awards dinner. Our company picked up 3 awards. It was pretty cool. We got a sponsorship award for raising a buttload of money, then we got an award for our t-shirt design (yay me!), and I got a outstanding team captain award (again, yay me!) It was nice. Free food. Hanging out with coworkers outside of work. Recognition for good work for a good cause. At each table in the center they had these big red orbs. We got to take ours home. Lulu is terrified of it. It's hilarious! Then each place setting had little jingle bells on them. I snagged some of the bells and put them on the rosemary wreath Hoss gave me at Thanksgiving. Now it looks all Christmas happy.

4. I can't wait till I get paid so I can complete my Christmas shopping. Just need to take care of the parental units, the husband, and pug child. I can't wait till Christmas after the baby is born though and old enough to know about Santa and thus the magic of Christmas will return, only this time I'll get to be Santa, but I'll get to see the joy on my child's face when Santa comes and brings presents and be woken up at 5:00 am with a little one screaming in my ears "SANTA CAME!!! SANTA CAME!! CAN WE OPEN PRESENTS?!" hehe. I dunno how old they are when they realize all that. Maybe two? I know first Christmas will be blah cos the baby will only be 7 months old and not really know what's going on, or maybe they will. I think they'll get a kick out of all the bright colors and lights. But yea, Christmas in 2009 will be all sorts of fun! I can't wait! I get to hid toys at work like my coworkers!

5. I may need to eat a motivational chocolate bar today. We'll see. They've been staring at me for the past day or two saying "EAT US!" Be careful what you wish for, little chocolate bars, for you just might get what you want...

6. We'll see how accurate the meteorologists are out here. Word on the street is we're getting snow tomorrow. But now they're saying it can start as early as tonight and we can have up to 4" tomorrow morning. Wouldn't that be a treat!? I'm hoping we have a white Christmas. With my luck, there won't be any snow then, but who knows. I've never had a white Christmas before. That would make me pretty darn happy to have snow on the floor Christmas morning. Although I would not be happy if my flight gets delayed because of weather conditions. Ugh!

7. I have raviolis for lunch, but I may change my mind and get a sammich somewheres. I'm thinking maybe something from Port of Pugs or a veggie delight from Wrong Way. Perhaps Wrong Way. I will be in that area anyway prospecting Christmas ornaments for the tree and possibly a village set up? I'm not 100% on the village yet cos of Lulu. She might be like the Godzilla of my tiny Christmas town and wreak havoc all over the city. I'd be pretty sad to come home and find headless people in the living room. Ok, executive decision, no village. We'll just have a snowy tree skirt. Ugh. I will get tinsel. If she eats it and poops it out, that one's on her heh.

8. Perhaps on my journeys I will pick up some decaf tea bags. Someone's been drinking them all. Even though Inga brought them in for me so I don't have a caffeinated wired baby. I'll get a box and keep it at my desk or something or a box that's big enough for everyone. Although, sharing 50 years ago was called Communism. *snort*

9. Did I mention how much I want it to snow? I think it'll be so awesome if it snows a lot and it doesn't melt and tomorrow after work we go shooting and kill us some SNOW MEN!!!

10. Monday is our ultrasound. The suspense is killing us! 4 more days till we find out if the Teague-tot is a he or a she! Of course with our luck, it will be a totally uncooperative little shit and we won't know till birth! I dunno. Earlier I really wanted a boy. I know Jesse wants a boy. But now I'm in the mind frame I'll be happy either way. If it's a boy I can get him the little pug dog sweater. If it's a girl I can get her cute little shoes and ruffle socks. Oh the confusion. I want one of each! I've been finding really cute baby and kids clothes. They sell baby converse!!!

Thursday, December 6, 2007


Living in Southern California, you never understand the concept of cold. I recall being a child and adult in the past saying I was cold or that I was freezing to the bone, never really knowing what it meant to be that cold.

Today I went out to pick up some little things for our tree and on my way back to the office, it got cold. I mean it went from feeling nice and brisk cold to intense chilling cold. It felt as though I had walked through the dead. It was freezing! And I know it's only going to get colder.

It's rather odd because so far, even though the temperature says it's a lot colder up here than it's been down in California, it hasn't really hit me as being as cold as it claims to be. I mean, we've had lows in the teens and highs in the thirties and forties as of lately and it hasn't phased me that I'm freezing my ass off yet like I used to feel back home. Who knows? We must have a really nice little heater in our apartment or something.

Creative Writing Time: Elfermative Action

Elfermative Action

People remember 10 Christmases ago when the storms were so bad, the night of Christmas Eve, Santa came into the work shop as the elves were loading up all the toys and announced, "Elves, reindeer, I have some bad news. Due to the weather, Christmas is canceled!" Everyone frowned and moaned and then he looked over at Rudolph and his glowing nose and suddenly blurted out, "Scratch that! It's back on! Rudolph! You saved Christmas!" Therefore it was back on.

That had be the biggest scare in the North Pole ever. The thought of Christmas being canceled. However, last year, was the worst.

Santa came into the shop around Thanksgiving and announced, "Elves, I have some bad news. Due to setbacks in the economy, I'm afraid I'm going to have to do some lay offs."

The elves were confused. What was a lay off? What's an economy? They knew nothing of the business world, as all of them had been born into Christmas Toy manufacturing. Their parents made toys, their parent's parents made toys and so on. That was all the elves knew. They lived in the North Pole under Santa's care and had everything they needed provided by Santa. Homes. Food. Medical and Dental. There was even an elf 401k program in which retired elves were allowed to stay in the North Pole for years of dutiful service till death.

At this point, Santa elaborated, "Any elf who receives a random pink slip in their Christmas card this year will need to leave the North Pole. I'm sorry, I wish I could help you, but I haven't the funds to take care of you all anymore and with all the kids becoming obsessed with internet gaming, xboxes, cell phones and iPods, there is no more desire for toys. Kids want electronics and you elves are not skilled enough to create theses things. They get them from their parents now and I see a bleak future for you elves, myself and the future of the North Pole. I'm sorry."

That night was a silent night indeed. As were all the other nights up till the 24th of December when the elves all received their Christmas cards. Usually their cards would have their Christmas bonus in there, some sort of cookies or treats baked by Mrs. Claus. This year, there were no treats. It was just a card. Some elves got pink slips in their card thanking them for their service and stating Santa would give them a good referral for any jobs they tried to get and it included the address and phone number to Santa's Workshop.

Fortunately, there were only 6 elves that met the tragic fate of downsizing. There was Blinky, an older elf who had served Santa for 40 years. Jingles, an elf who was fairly new to the toy making trade fresh out of elf school. Tookie and Wookie, a brother and sister who came from a long line of toy makers. Tinkles, a very old elf and Jolly, an average elf.

Santa, being the nice man he was, told them he would give them a plane ticket to anywhere in the world they wanted to help them get started off. Upon research, the elves decided they wanted to go to the United States of America. It was, after all, the big melting pot, land of opportunities, the elves were sure they could get a decent living there. But they didn't have any form of ID to get into the US, so Santa sent them to Mexico and told them to meet up with a friend of his, Papa Noel.

Papa Noel was one of Santa's old friends and buddies. He did a lot of Santa's work in Mexico handing out toys there since there were so many boys and girls and Santa couldn't possibly be in each country at once in one night. He had friends all over the world, but Papa Noel would help the elves get into the US and find jobs.

So the elves hopped on a plane and were greeted in sunny Mexico by a fat dark skinned man who was built like Santa but wore a bright colored poncho instead of a red suit.

"HOLA! You must be the elves from Senor Santa! Come, I'll help you find jobs in America!" He then led the elves to his El Camino and put them in the back where they sat on bags of rice with bright colored blankets on top. "In North Pole, Santa has a sleigh with 8 reindeer. In Mexico, I take toys to children in my El Camino!" He honked the horn, which was set up to honk in the tune of Feliz Navidad, the popular Christmas song south of the border, and they drove off.

Papa Noel took the elves to his workshop. It wasn't as clean as the one in the North Pole. The elves looked like they were not eating well and working very hard with little sleep. "This is MY workshop! These are MY elves! And over there, is the elves burro, Paco. They like to play soccer with him and the chickens on their breaks!" At that moment, a whistle blew, signaling it was time for a break for the elves. They jumped up joyously and went out to a dirty yard and kicked around a ball made of tape. To the North Pole elves' surprise, the donkey and the chickens knew how to play soccer as well. The donkey brayed and kicked the ball with his back foot to a chicken, who clucked and bumped the ball with it's head, sending it to the other side of the yard. Even though their working conditions were different here, all the elves seemed happy and had fun. After all, smiles and fun are a large part of being an elf!

"We must meet up with Miguel. He will help you get your new jobs in America!" Papa Noel then took the elves back to his El Camino and they drove throughout town, seeing all the boys and girls playing on the streets in bright colorful clothes. The elves loved the colors but thought it was an odd contrast to the dirt roads and terra cotta colored buildings.

Soon they got to a very dark and scary part of town. There were no children on the streets, nor were there any people outside anywhere. Papa Noel pulled into a dark alley and told the elves, "Wait here." He then walked off and came back with a skinny man.

"This is Miguel!" he said.

Miguel looked at the elves one by one, carefully examining them. "Yes, yes, I see. OK!" He shuffled through a stack of cards and handed one card to each elf. "These are your California Drivers Licenses and Social Security cards. You need these to get jobs. Tonight, at midnight, meet me back here and I will take you to the border and you will go to America. After that, you are on your own."

"Why can't we go now?" asked one of the elves. "We have all we need to get jobs."

"YOU CANNOT GO NOW!" Miguel exclaimed. "It is too dangerous. You must wait till after dark."

That night, after dark, the elves met up with Miguel. He took them to a very dangerous looking fence with barbed wire. He walked along and found a hole and led the elves through. "Go, make a new life for yourself in America. It's better out there!"

The elves spent the rest of the night traveling through more desert. They complained about being cold or hungry. Some of them fell asleep while the others continued on.

The next morning, the elves that fell asleep were rudely awoken by some snarling dogs. "GET UP!" Some men in uniform were pointing guns at them. "GET UP NOW! STATE YOUR NAME!"




"What is this? Some sort of joke? Where are your parents?"

"We're not children, we're elves! We came from Santa's workshop in the North Pole." said Blinky.

"We lost our jobs because kids don't want toys anymore, they want electronic games and we can't make those." scowled Tinkles.

"We flew to Mexico and Papa Noel took us to his friend Miguel and he gave us cards to get jobs in America and, are we in America or do we need to go further?" asked Jingles.

"ILLEGALS! BORDER HOPPERS! Is this what they teach you in your elf place where you came from? That you can just go to Mexico and STEAL people's identities and steal AMERICA's money?" shouted the officer. He then grabbed each elf, handcuffed them and dragged them to his car and hauled them off to the immigration offices.

Now the other elves that kept walking throughout the the night were pressed with a new problem: they had no homes, no food, no money, nothing. Jolly saw a man on the street with a sign that read "Will work for food." He stood next to the man and made a sign on a napkin with some dirt and the man yelled at him to get out of his territory. So Jolly walked down a few blocks and became a beggar.

Tookie and Wookie thought they'd try to find real jobs instead of relying on the charity of others. After all, this wasn't the North Pole. People didn't seem as friendly. In fact, they were very mean. Tookie walked into a restaurant and asked for a job. When they asked his qualifications, he said he knew how to make toys and that he had made toys all his life. The manager asked if he had any proof of citizenship.

"What's that?" asked Tookie.

"You know, a drivers license? Social security card? Some sort of ID that says you can work here and you're legal?" said the manager.

Then, remembering the cards Miguel gave him the night before, Tookie exclaimed, "Oh, yes! I have those!" He reached into his pocket and pulled out some ID which read Jose Campos and showed a cocoa skinned man's face with dark hair saying the age was 34, weight of 130 lbs, and a height of 5'4". The manager looked at the card and looked at Tookie, then at the card again. Tookie, who was merely 20 in elf years had a soft white complexion with yellow hair, blue eyes, and was 40 lbs. tops for a whopping height of 3'.

"You can be a busboy. I'll pay you $2 an hour, cash. You'll work 7 days a week from 5 am to midnight. That's our operating hours. Take it, or leave it."

Tookie, excited by his offer jumped for joy and said "I'll take it!" Then, in a moment of confusion, he asked, "What does a bus boy do anyway?"

"They get the dishes! People eat, you take their dishes when they leave. You take them to the back, you wash them, you dry them and then put them by the cooks so they can use them again. It's not rocket science. If you can make a toy you can clean up after dishes." he then threw an apron at Tookie and grumbled off.

Wookie meanwhile was having a harder time finding work. She looked everywhere all over town. She walked and walked and finally wound up on the outskirts of town. Finally she found herself in a field of strawberries and she saw several people picking the berries. Oh how she longed to eat just a few of them. She was so hungry. She walked up to a little hut and asked the man sleeping inside, "Sir, may I have a few of your berries? I have no money or job and I need food."

The man woke up and looked down at her. "No. You can NOT have any of MY berries. You can, however, work for me picking the berries. I will allow you to stay on the land and you can have berries when you want. I will pay you $0.30 per berry you pick each day. You can pick from sunrise to sunset and take a break mid day for lunch. Anything you do needs to be on your own time, that is, after sunset or before sunrise. You need to build shelter? You do it then. You gotta go to town? You do it then. As long as the sun is up, you're on my time."

Tookie, desperate for food, took on his offer. She scurried out to the field with a basket he gave her and picked a berry, then ate a berry, picked another, and ate another, until her belly and basket were full.

Meanwhile, Jolly was not having any luck. He managed to find $1.25 in various change on the floor walking around the city and earned another $0.50 sitting in front of stores. "This stinks!" he said. He then got up and walked around town till he got to the residential parts. He saw homes and thought maybe someone would be nice enough to let him have a bite to eat. However, since it was a Monday, everyone was at work. "Maybe I can just sneak in like Santa does when he gives kids presents!" He looked around. None of the houses in the area had chimenies, so he tried to open a window. Nothing opened. Everything was locked. "How does Santa do it?!" he thought. Finally, he saw a small stone in a garden and thought, if he threw the rock at the window, he could get in. He'd break the window but he could get food. By this point he didn't care.

He threw a rock and broke into the home. Once inside, he walked around. He found the kitchen and opened the fridge. There was all sorts of food and drinks inside. He made a big juicy turkey sandwich and found a tall bottle of a drink he never heard of before: Beer. Now, another part of being an elf is a curious nature, so he decided he would see what this beer drink was all about. He drank the bottle and soon began to feel silly. He liked beer, so he had another one. Soon enough, he found he drank all the beer in the house! He wanted more beer so he tore the place apart like a maniac in search of more beer. While he was unsuccessful he did find some rather peculiar objects in the upstairs bedroom. Inside a night stand, he found a shiny gun. It looked like the toy cap guns he was used to making for boys and girls. He also found a bag of powdered sugar.

"This must be really good sugar if they're hiding it in their drawer!" he thought. And being an elf, naturally he was drawn to the sugar. He dipped his finger in it and tasted it. It didn't taste like sugar at all! He smelled it to see if it was old or stale and wound up inhaling it. His nose burned but not too long after he started to feel really excited and happy. This was a magic happy sugar you sniffed to enjoy, not eat! So he sniffed more and ran around the house with the gun, completely forgetting about the beer. Now he wanted more magic sugar.

By this time, he was so hopped up, he wasn't thinking properly. He ran outside, back to the city, lights and colors a whirl. He demanded people give him more magic sugar or tell him where he could find the magic sugar. People ran away from him and were screaming at the sight of a high elf with a gun. Suddenly, four cars with flashing red and blue lights cornered him and a voice came from one of the cars, "PUT DOWN THE GUN AND FREEZE!"

"DO YOU HAVE THE MAGIC SUGAR?" he yelled, flailing the gun around.

"PUT DOWN THE GUN NOW, OR WE'LL SHOOT!" the car voice said again.

Jolly started spinning around looking for the magic sugar when all of a sudden he passed out. Eight officers ran up to him and seized the gun, cuffing his hands, and threw him in the back of one of the cars.

When Jolly woke up, he was in a dark place, surrounded by very scary looking people. He felt very sick and was cold and shaking. He looked around and saw three familiar faces: Jingles, Blinky, and Tinkles.

"Jolly! Is that you?" asked Blinky. "What happened to you?"

"I tried to get food in the city, but that didn't work. So I went into someone's house and ate food and had beer and magic sugar and then I woke up and now I don't feel very good." he said. "What happened to you three?"

"We fell asleep in the desert at night. The next morning, we were taken away by a man with a very mean dog. They told us they're deporting us." said Tinkles.

"What does that mean?" asked Jolly.

"It means they're sending us back to Mexico or the North Pole. Now we'll never get jobs!" said Jingles.

The four little elves sulked in a corner, trying to stay away from the scary people they were locked up with.

Tookie and Wookie weren't doing very well themselves. Tookie kept dropping plates and breaking things because he couldn't reach the counters and Wookie kept eating more berries than she was picking. But that was the least of their problems.

One day, immigration officers came to their works and asked to see everyone's ID's. They got to Tookie and asked him, "Show us your ID." He handed them his cards and they asked him, "What's your name?"

"Tookie!" he said proudly.

"Says here you're Jose Campos." said the officer.

"It does? That must be wrong. Miguel must have given me the wrong card." he said.

"Who is Miguel? How much did you pay for this?" asked the officer.

"Miguel is the man who Papa Noel took us to that gave us cards and took us to a fence and told us we could get jobs with them." he replied.

"Papa Noel, huh? Peter!" the officer called to his friend, "We got another one of those Papa Noel people. Cuff him!"

Tookie was thrown into a large bus with lots of other people. Amidst those people he saw Wookie. She told him how she had been caught in the field while picking berries. They sat together till they were thrown into a big cell with scary people. They looked around and saw their four elf friends and joined up with them immediately.

Over the course of the next few months, they stayed together to avoid fights and harassment. They noticed people where they were at tended to stay together in groups based on their skin colors when out on the yard. There were the white people, the dark people, and the really dark people. The elves never saw any people like this before. Most of them were covered with drawings and looked very big.

Finally, around Thanksgiving, the elves were all summoned into a room. There was a man in a fancy suit sitting behind a large table. He spoke, "You elves are here illegally. We are going to send you back to where you came from. I know you said you came in from Mexico, but if we send you there, you'll either try to come back to the US again or you'll have a much harder time over in Mexico. So after a lot of discussion with my superiors, we have decided to send you back to the North Pole. We've contacted Santa and he said he will pick you up when he delivers toys around Christmas. You'll have to wait here another month. If he does not pick you up, we will keep you as prisoners here until we can find something else to do with you."

The elves were excited about seeing Santa again. It had been a year since they last saw him. They missed him and Mrs. Claus, the reindeer, and all the other elves. But most of all, they missed being home. Even though they had temporary homes and jobs in the US, it wasn't as good as it was back with Santa. The next month was hard for them as they waited each day till Santa would return.

Finally, Christmas Eve arrived. The elves were summoned out again and at midnight, Santa came into the prison, signed some release forms, and took the elves back to his sleigh.

"My dear Jingle, Tinkle, Blinky, Jolly, Tookie and Wookie, I'm sorry you had to go through all of this. I certainly thought Papa Noel would have taken better care of you and that you would have got good jobs and been happy in America. I didn't know it was possible for an elf to be sad or not productive. But I have good news for you all. In the last year, there were a lot of babies born and they need toys. They're too young to play with electronics and after last year, you missed Christmas, we discovered while boys and girls like their xboxes and iPods, they still enjoy toys. So you'll all be able to return to the workshop and make toys again!" Santa told them.

The elves smiled in glee and gave Santa a big hug. They got to follow Santa on his toy deliveries that night. As they were flying home, they waved goodbye to the city that was so harsh to them and fell asleep smiling over thoughts of returning to the North Pole where they would get a cookie and hot cocoa, take a bath, put on some cozy jammies, and go to bed in their little elf beds only to wake up and start making toys for next year.


Motivational Chocolate

It started with the Motivational Cookie.

A few weeks ago, Jesse took me to lunch at Port of Subs. I got a cookie but couldn't eat it after I ate so I saved it for later. As a joke, I put a post-it on it that said "MOTIVATIONAL COOKIE" and propped it on my desk. People were amused and kept asking me what it was for, to which I replied, "It's to motivate me."

Har har.

Needless to speak, the cookie was devoured in a matter of minutes and needed to be replaced one day.

Not to far down the line, I brought a Hershey's bar to work. I was going to eat it when I got a chocolate craving, but ironically enough, that never happened. So I put a post-it on there stating "MOTIVATIONAL CHOCOLATE BAR". People were amused again and asked what it was for and about, to which I said again, "It's there for motivation."

Lo and behold, yesterday, I ate it.

This morning, I was in the bathroom and when I walked out, there was a 6 pack of Hershey's chocolate bars on my desk! I picked them up and frantically tried to figure out where they came from, to which I learned they were from Shelley, for helping her get a picky client to sign a contract. She said they were new motivation for me.

So yes, I have 6 days worth of motivation staring me in the face. It's great!


So everyone keeps telling me that I need to start looking for daycare. Right. I'm not due for another 5 months, still have no idea what we're having and I already need to look!? So on a stunt of down time, I was looking on the yellow pages to see what kinda day cares are available in the area and I come across this disturbing, yet amusing, find:

Somehow, whoever did this directory listing, managed to screw it up by adding a Chinese restaurant in the mix. Yea. Wow. My words exactly.

Krispy Kreme : Not my first choice in donuts

I was all excited this morning. I went to make my daily morning decaf tea and I saw a box of donuts on the table. They were from Krispy Kreme. There were some filled donuts and then some sprinkle donuts. Not being a fan of filled anythings, I got sprinkles. They were holiday festive looking with red, white, and green sprinkles on top. Bad decision. The sprinkles felt like raw rice, hard to a crisp. The donut was too sweet. I can say I'm not a big fan of Krispy Kreme, aka Krispy Krap. Bad donuts. Over rated. I don't get the hype.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Happy Mexico Day... You're just jealous...

Today we were on Sepulveda and Vanowen in a parking lot and when we got in the car, Lowrider came on. So I turned it up full blast, rolled the windows down and cruised out. This hispanic dude at this auto shop was looking at us totally jealous cos he wanted to be cruisin listening to War instead of working. I waved hi to him and drove off. Lori was embarassed and danielle was laughing her ass off.

Then, we went to Lake Balboa and met up with Heather and Billy there. There was apparently a hispanic wedding party taking their wedding photos by the lake. They were there for like 2 hours cos that's how long we were there. But like they were in full on wedding dress, bridesmaid dresses, and men in suits. There was a professional photographer. It was pretty wild. We were talking about how shitty it must be to take your wedding pics at Lake Balboa cos like the people in the background of your photos are all gonna be dressed in street clothes and stuff and oh yea, there will be people in the background of your photos....

When we left there, Tequila came on the radio, so it was the same deal. Turn it up full blast, roll the windows down and cruise along shouting out the lyrics to the song... TEQUILA!!!!

it was a fun day.

oh yeah, not that it matters, but Grand Master Flash's White Lines is one of the best damn songs ... ever. Which is why it's my new myspace song. That and E-40 got "deleted by artist". ass!!!

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Never ending vacuum

Somewhere in the neighborhood, I can't figure out where, there is someone vacuuming. They have been vacuuming for the last half hour. I'm not too sure how huge their house is but I am sure that however large it is, it can't possibly take more than 10 minutes to vacuum!!! I gotta headache dammit!!!

Monday, December 3, 2007

First Advent Sunday

Today is the first Sunday of Advent. Because of this I thought it might be a good time for me to go back to church. I haven't found a church in Reno yet. I really liked my old one. It was small. Not to flashy. Close to home. So on the close to home front, I found that the Little Flower Church is a Catholic church, so I went this morning to check it out. It's about the same size of St. Bridget's but instead of going back far it is spread out in a half moon shape. That sorta weirded me out but it's one of those things I could easily learn to live with. The father is this little old Philipino guy but he was pretty funny. He cracked a joke type allegory about protestants that was pretty funny. Downside it's a little hard to understand him sometimes but I could if I just listen carefully. Aside from that, the inside decor of the church isn't too flashy. They have some nice stained glass going on but that's on the north side of the building, so it doesn't pick up the sunlight too well. I suppose we can't always design in the traditional Latin Cross plan of early western churches and cathedrals anymore... Anyway, I'll probably keep going there because it's close. I suppose I should go to confession next weekend as it's been a while...

On the way home, I walked down some streets and saw houses for sale. I saw in person one house I saw online and thought was rather cute. Turns out it is a lot cuter in person than online. It has a really cool little front yard that you can't see on the pics online. I took a flyer from their seller info box. I passed other houses for sale but those ones didn't have any flyers left. I like that one house though. The neighborhood is close to the church, the school, lots of nice people on that street including an old man who had 3 labs: black, chocolate, and golden. They were all slightly overweight and very adorable.

When I got home, I was very mad at Lulu. She tore the the house apart and ate all my Tums and would have eaten my Tylenol too if she could find a way to get that open. She tore apart the bathroom trash, broke my razor, ate my chapstick, chewed on my lotion and thank god that didn't break open. She's been so good but outta nowhere decided to be a bad bad pug. I punished her then took her out to potty.

A little while later, I made a few phone calls, ate a bowl of soup and fell asleep. I woke up hearing that damn kid across the way who was all hyphy over Thanksgiving yelling at someone. I looked outside and hyphy boy was with some bitch. Then I realized his yelling wasn't like when he was yelling at us at Thanksgiving, but rather, he was having a conversation with someone. Via yelling. From his porch. Upstairs. Across the street. I wanted to go out there and strangle him. I was so tired and that nap was the best thing that happened to me all day. That shit stole it from me. By that point, I couldn't fall asleep. I was cranky and hungry. I made some pb&j and watched tv. My back hurts slightly. Nothing as bad as it's been the past few weeks but it hurts. I need more Tums. And Sprite. I should take Lu pug out to potty now. I'm cranky and don't feel up to doing anything at this point...

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Just my luck, huh?

Somewhere between yesterday practically leaving work and last night I got this really cool design idea so I plotted out my courses and began a plan of action. I worked on it last night and sent it to complete working on it some more today. I came up with, what I think is to be, a rather sweet ass cover design. But it will be a while before it is showed. I can't wait. I'm hoping the client will likey!!!

Then today I had another doctor's appointment. All is fine and well but I thought I had an appointment on Monday coming up. Turns out it's not till the 10th. Dammit! I'm going crazy here kids! None the less, I suppose it's better then. We'll see! :)

Wednesday, November 28, 2007


Today my stomach and I haven't been getting along very well. All day it's been a battle of gurgle, churn, fart, gurgle, churn, fart. Fart, fart, churn. Gurgle gurgle gurgle. On and off and on and off and then with the back ache or the stabbing cramp on the stomach. One thing or another. It's always something. I want to sleep and I know I won't be able to cos somewhere I'm gonna be awoken by a gurgle or a churn or a fart or some sort of bodily ache. Fuck me! I need my husband to get off the goddamn phone and rub my back or something NOW!!!!

Monday, November 26, 2007


Today I was able to sleep in! I felt so special! I woke up around 10:00. I may even go back to sleep! I think I finally figured it out. When Jesse left for work, I asked him to turn the radio off. He sleeps with the AM radio on. It becomes a distraction for me in the morning when I'm in that half up half asleep state and thus wind up just waking up and listening. Then I realize how boring the home and garden show is and leave to do other things. And then I'll take a nap somewhere between 1:00 and 4:00 to make up for my lack of morning sleep. I dunno. We'll hafta do something about his sleeping habits vs. mine if I ever want to sleep in again. Cos I gotta admit, I really liked it. Yawn. I'm gonna eat the rest of yesterdays waffles...


This morning I slept in and it was nice. Then later in the day after breakfast I decided to do laundry. I have no car so I put all our clothes into Jesse's basket along with the detergent and walked down to the lavandaria. I didn't realize how heavy the clothes were till I got a block away from our apartment. I would then walk a block, stop, put the basket down, take a break, pick it up, walk another block, and repeat. I utilized the time there to relax and gain back my arm strength. Upon the walk home, I spied a shopping cart and thought, "fuck it." I put the basket in the cart and used it to get home. By that point my back hurt too much to carry anything and I don't know what the hell I was thinking about doing laundry and shit. Let's just say it was a stupid idea. I need one of them old lady carts or something so I can do laundry and walk to the store or something on my days off. Ok, anyway, after I got home my day was wasted away on nothing. Eating my usual cream of mushroom Sunday soup in a can with excessive pepper and watching tv. Somewhere along the line of an hour ago I got a bit of a tummy ache and had some diarrhea. Then as of the last 5 minutes, I have this really disgusting gnarly craving for See's Candy. I even went to their website dammit! I don't know what the hell I was thinking! Even if I did have money to order from them online it wouldn't be here tonight! I want chocolate and truffles! I want holiday candy dammit! I can't stand it! I feel like I'm gonna cry. On top of it all, Jesse's working late tonight. All I want is some See's candy...

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Turkey Day

I had my fears yesterday about Thanksgiving. That the turkey wouldn't brown. Stuff wouldn't taste right. I dunno. But everything came out just fine in the end. All I had to worry about was soaking the roaster rack to get the turkey goo off of it. I was a little worried about that shit kid across the street cos our windows were open and we were all looking at him when he was trying to break his mom's door down and he kept saying shit to us yesterday. I think he was on drugs or something. But I was worried he would come back with his homeboys or something later on and try to do something to us. Fortunately, nothing happened last night and I guess neighbors must have called on him somewhere cos this morning we had a cop car circling that area and the rest of our neighborhood nice and slow like so that comforted me a little. Hopefully he'll be around the rest of the day since Jesse's at work and I'm all by my lonesome heh. Yesterday I threw up from getting noxious after picking up dog poo and I haven't felt too hot since. It never really left my system, that biley taste that ruins everything. I guess this nervous feeling hasn't helped my stomach any and maybe was a catalyst to me not wanting to/being able to eat as much as I could have yesterday. I think I enjoyed the cooking part and the boys enjoyed the eating part more. Anyway, I got all the food packed away in the fridge, all the dishes washed and ready to be housed, everything is good. I had the sorest feet last night from standing in the kitchen all day. Then when bedtime came, I had some weird hormonal crap where I felt all depressed and worried and couldn't sleep. Jesse rubbed my back even though it didn't hurt to try and lull me to bed. It worked. It was pretty funny how everyone checked out early last night courtesy overdosing on turkey downers. Anyway, tonight when Jesse gets off work, I'm due for a trip to the mall. Hopefully they're open late tonight. I need some new clothes. The end.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Hyphy bastard

The asshat kid on the other side of the street who always blasts his shit rap all day was trying to break into his apartment today. I guess his mom locked him out and he was kicking the door. Jesse and Hoss were having one of those what the shit? moments. Then the kid sees that we're all looking at him and starts talking shit and trying to be all hard. Whatever. I told the boys they should go down and beat his ass. What a turd. Obviously mommy doesn't want you around and neither do we. I don't know why some people feel like they need to ruin other people's Thanksgivings.

Thursday, November 22, 2007


Tonight Jesse was reloading and I was watching him and he was like "you wanna try?" Duh. So he showed me how to reload. He showed me on Saturday or Sunday night how to pop out the old primers but tonight I learned how to put in a new primer, pour the powder and put in the bullet. I don't know how to measure the powder. He has a magic device that you just lift a crank and it automatically pours the right amount so you get an even amount every time and don't hafta weigh it every time. It's pretty cool. I feel all slick now that I can reload. I feel like I have a new found skill that I will most likely utilize on my excessive time off or boredom periods. And it'll be one of those things where I'm doing busy work and amusing myself but doing something totally useful in the process. This is great! I think when I get money around Christmas I'll buy some stuff so I don't waste all of Jesse's reloading supplies and start reloading my own 9mm for whenever I shoot the P-38 or borrow the Sig. I'd like Jesse to get some .45 so we can take Bathroom Gun out. After all, if I win that Kimber, I'll hafta be more accurate with a .45, so... plus it'll be one of those things where I can reload .45 in hopes of getting that Kimber and if I don't, no harm, no foul, right? I'd like to reload for some of the guns we don't take out too often. And I'd like to reload some .223 so I can play with Jesse's AR-15 more and then I'll have a buttload ready for the day he gets my green AR-15 built. Yes, I see a lot of reloading in our future...

Wednesday, November 21, 2007


So apparently Lulu has a favorite toy. This toy is Otter. Otter is a little stuffed otter with a squeaky inside. Otter is long and skinny and fluffy. We're not sure what it is that attracts her to Otter so much as he is very similar to other toys she has, that being, stuffed, soft, and squeaky. For a while her favorite toy was Hedgehog, but then when Otter came into the house, Hedgehog got thrown aside and Otter took the place of favorite toy. She could be chewing on something else and the minute she sees Otter, she drops what she's doing and runs to him. It's weird. Yea. That's all I got.

I fought HR and I won

I get this snide email yesterday about my insurance and that someone forgot to bill me for it last pay period so they were going to double my payment to get me "caught up". Our biz manager says that's not right and to fight it so I sent an email dispute to which I'm told that I knew I was going to hafta pay for insurance and that I shouldn't be shocked. I told her about it and she was like "WHAT!? I'm gonna talk to them about this.." And I said, "While you're at it, I think I was supposed to get a raise after 90 days. Could you look into that because I think that time may have passed and it hasn't been reflected in my paycheck yet." So she goes through my paperwork and sees my letter of hire and was like "Well, they should retro this pay. I'll call them." So she calls and faxes my info over in her words "that it better be on this next pay check." She does her job and is pissed that HR doesn't do theirs to make sure their employees are taken care of. Scumbags. Anyway, they agreed to split my payment up into 3 parts now conveniently. And I will be getting my retro pay on my raise. It's only an extra $1 an hour but when you have an extra $1 an hour times 200 something hours, it's a pretty penny. Needless to speak, I should have enough for rent this pay period (but Jesse will hafta buy the groceries this time around) and that come Christmas there should be a decent amount of money for presents. :)

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Deal of the Day!!!

At lunch the biz manager and I were doing our usual browsing of the Sunday paper ads and we found one for Linens and Things. The ad was buy a $15 roaster with rack get a $5 rebate and a free 15 piece knife set and block, turkey platter, two gravy boats, and salt and pepper shaker (an $80 value) so says the ad. Needless to speak, it didn't take a genius to figure this one out. I said "LET'S GO! If they have it we'll get one, if they don't we'll go back to work. Couldn't hurt."

So we get there and there's this stack of like 50 sets. We both get one. It was a great deal. I am totally a happy camper because I wanted to get a turkey platter for Thanksgiving. Now I have one. Plus I also have gravy boats! And my roaster (which I won't use this year since I have a disposable one and will use that to avoid excess dishes but I will use it for our Christmas ham!)

I'm psyched! I feel accomplished. I have sought out a great deal and succeeded with excellence! Hooray for values!!!

Sunday, November 18, 2007

********* UPDATE: Pie ********

I had to take a sit down and relax for a minute or two due to cramps and aches... and pry myself away from the pecan topping. I keep nibbling on it. There won't be any left at the rate I'm going!

All pastry crusts have been built. Apple pie pastry and lattice materials are set aside and waiting for filling.

I'm not a pumpkin pie fan but I tasted the pumpkin pecan pie elements and I think I might hafta have a slice of it. The filling is very sweet and creamy. The pecan mixture is very crunchy and sweet. It's currently on it's first round in the oven awaiting it's topping, which I can't keep my hands off of. It's a mix of ground up pecans, brown sugar, and butter. It's warm and delicious.

Anyway, one pie is partially done, the other is in the works. I suppose it's time I get back to cutting the apples. That will take a while and it's never fun, but what can I say, it's gotta be done...

********* UPDATE: Pie Part 2 ********

Well, now it's 10:25 in the night. Pies are completed and in the freezer. I kept swatting Jesse's grubby little wrist because he kept motioning like he wanted to eat the pumpkin pecan pie...

When he got off work he had this inquisitive nature to him as if he smelled something interesting but couldn't quite figure it out. He asked what I was making and I told him pie and the pumpkin pecan was baking and I was cutting apples for the apple. I then let him taste the topping. This must have increased the desire to eat the pie, having whet his taste buds for the delicousness.

After the 50 minutes baking I took it out and spread the topping. I strayed from the recipe and covered it with pecan halves in the style of a traditional pecan pie and brushed some butter over them to give them a gloss and buttery goodness. I'm rather impressed with how lovely that pie came out. Jesse was acting like a little boy saying "can't we just eat it tonight?" "NO." "Whyeeee???" "Because. It's for THursday." "Can't you just make another one?" "No. I don't like making dough. It's kinda a pain in the butt. THat's why I did them today." "Oh-kay...."

The apple pie was then put in shortly after and baked to a golden crisp. After cooling, they were covered and placed in the freezer to preserve for Thanksgiving. So there won't be a totally home made pie. Basically it'll be a thawed out and slightly re-heated pie, but hey, they started out home made. Besides they'll still be tasty. I can't wait to try the pumpkin pecan pie. Even though I don't like pumpkin pie, since I know what went in there and saw everything I have less of a fear about it, so I'm more inclined to taste it. Plus its my creation, so I gotta give it a whirl for my own personal critique.

After pie, dinner was made, I took that nice long bath I was thinking about all day and now we're snacking on brownie batter. We may need to bake some of it cos it seems rather abundant. We'll see. I'm ready for bed. I had a long day. I cleaned house, made 2 pies, cooked dinner while the hubby played with his new reloading press (which he has confirmed to be rather fond of... I'm glad!) and washed dishes. Whew! I think I deserve a good night's sleep... and a back rub. Jesse, take a hint!

Oh dear...

Thanksgiving is in a few days and it has come to my attention our apartment is well, a mess. It's one of those things where there is so much to do and so little time to do it. I'm probably stressing myself over nothing, but, Thanksgiving is only the beginning of it all. We still have Christmas, which is a whole other story. We need to find room for all the crap by the window so we can put up our Christmas tree. I know Jesse's going to be really fussy about that. I'm already visualizing how we can maximize our space. Personally I wish that stuff wasn't there so I could put a rocking/recliner there or something. There never seems to be enough sitting room in here. Ugh. There's an array of crap in here which is not mine, therefore I can't pack up or put away. That frustrates me. I have a lot of cleaning to do. Then somewhere in between all of that I need to bake and freeze two pies for Thursday, make dinner, and find time for a bath to relax my ever-so-sore muscles. I just feel drained like I can't even do anything. Yesterday really took a toll on me, from waking up at the buttcrack of dawn, to doing the laundry with an aching back, to shooting and coming home and making dinner and washing dishes. Sometimes I feel like I need a day off. Fortunately for me, that day will be at the end of this week and I will have not one, not two, but three days to relax...hopefully. I swear, if I had the money I'd go to one of them nice fancy day spas and just get like a nice long massage and all that other good stuff and just RELAX. I felt like I was falling asleep when I was having my hair done on Friday. I swear, stress hits me at every angle. Work, home, even 500 miles away from my family! That's not supposed to happen! It got so bad last Thursday, one of those days where anything that could possibly go wrong did, that by the time I got home, I plopped on the bed, took a deep breath and burst out bawling uncontrollably. Sometimes, I just feel helpless, like there is no end. Fortunately Friday was better. I hope this week goes by quickly and that we can go home early on Wednesday. I need to figure out how to maximize my oven and cooking time. And I need to remember to take my vitamin and drink my water.

If nothing else...

At least I got the apartment cleaned today. Now if only I could motivate myself to make the pies...

Friday, November 16, 2007


Good things happen to good people.

This morning in a meeting for a project we'll be working on next month. The client told me his idea for a cover concept and I told him mine. He was blown away with my suggestion and told me I am "on it" and tells my boss he has some "really sharp people" working for him.

My ads are 99% done. Those that didn't get done are waiting for camera ready stuff. Out of my control. I just did what I could and told the guy assembling the Orange Book the sizes and locations of the ads. That's all I can do.

I got my gun back today. A long ass time ago I pawned it cos we were really hard up for money. I did what I had to do. I used to worry when my mom would tell me how my dad lost his guns by pawning them. Well, I got my Lil' Deuce Deuce back and we shall never part again.

I had to run out of work early today to get my hair done. It came out pretty cool. I'm growing the black parts out and trying to get it to my natural color so I can do something else with it. Maybe dye it brown or red. Not sure yet. The back is really choppy layers so it looks bad ass. This new gal is a LOT cheaper and does a way better job. She's more interesting too. And gave me good tips for cooking turkey.

After, Jesse picked me up and we drove down to Sportsmans to pick up his birthday present. I budgeted $280 for his present. He got a reloading press. Then he got some other crap for it so he can start reloading this weekend. He said he would put some money in towards it cos he thought it would be too expensive but I told him with his discount it would probably even out. It did. It came out to $281.25. I saw the total and was like "YES!!!" I guess its not every day someone gets excited about a purchase that's almost $300 but hey, it was $1.25 over my budget. Won't kill anyone. I was psyched. Jesse's very psyched.

We took all his new birthday goodies home and walked down to the strip. We had dinner at Ichiban (Reno's version of Benihana inside Harrah's.) We had all sorts of shrimp, teriyaki chicken, filet mignon, and I had lobster. Jesse got some gay ass Panda drink, some frou frou melon flavored alcoholic drink, that came in a ceramic panda cup. I think that was the most exciting thing for him. Our chef was some sort of Hispanic guy and I looked at Jesse and joked, "So, Miguel, what part of Japan are you from again?" and Jesse looked back and responded, "Juarez". We snickered.

At the end of the night we had a nice little night. Jesse's totally getting a kick out of the birthday card his work gave him. I'm glad he had a nice birthday. I love my booger husband. :)

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Port of Subs - How I am Loyal to Thee...

I had to go to the bank today not to my liking. I wanted to get something online and my debit card was not working, so since there's a bank down the street, I just went in and asked why. I was told that according to my request when I had my name changed on x date, to have my card deactivated and they deactivated it on the 12th of this month (Monday.) I also learned that I can no longer use this non-active atm card to pull money out of the atm, pay for purchase, basically it's useless. So I pulled out some cash while there and headed back on my lunch break.

I was near Subway and thought "I'll get a sandwich. As I opened the door, through the glass staring at me was the Port of Subs sign across the street. Granted, it was a farther walk from where I was at, and I had already walked about a mile, but, I was struck with a fit of desire! If I walk only a little farther, I can pay more for a tastier sandwich! Needless to speak, I closed the door to Wrong Way and trekked just a little further to Port of Subs. I got a salami sandwich with smoked cheddar on sourdough and a big cookie. Sure, I had lost 5 minutes from my eating time thanks to this decision, but it was worth it. I have realized today that I can no longer eat Subway or Quiznos, for my heart belongs to Port of Subs. Eat there and you will know.

A blog for the Prefered List

Ok, seeing as you are on this list, you are of the small group of people that know I'm already pregnant.

Anyway, this is a few gripes I have about pregnant women and being pregnant:

I finally didn't feel fat today but felt like I finally looked preggo. I was in a meeting with my boss, who told me I was starting to look pregnant. He knows because I hafta clear my days off with him. Plus he won't go blabbing around to everyone. Either way, I told him I was relieved he said that because I had been stressing over feeling fat and not pregnant for the last few weeks. I told him how a pregnant belly draws thoughts of "aww you're pregnant" while the fat belly draws looks of "eew, you're fat and have no self control."

None the less, I try to do things that make me feel better in my phase of rapid growth. Yesterday I got two new shirts. Stupid thing, I know, since I probably won't fit them in a few months. None the less, they were only $2.50 on a clearance rack, so who cares? And they are shirts that seem to accentuate my pregnant belly and make it look more pregnant than fat. Plus they are that really soft stretchy cotton/lycra with elastic in them, so who knows, maybe I'll be able to wear them longer than I hoped.

This morning I decided to wear make up. I haven't worn make up to work since Halloween. And the only reason I did that was cos I was dressed up. Before that, I think it was maybe back in August or even further when I actually started my job! Regardless, I always see to it that I dress nicely for work. I hate the philosophy pregnant women have that if your pregnant, that gives you the right to dress like a slob. That somehow lounge wear is allowed as outer wear. I don't believe anyone should wear pajamas as clothing. Especially if you're going to the doctors at 3:00 in the afternoon. You have no excuse for not getting dressed by then. And I don't believe you have the right to dress like the clubbing slut you were before you got pregnant while you're pregnant. You dress that way so you can get laid. When you're 7 or 8 months pregnant, it's obvious you can get some, you don't need to dress like you're still out on the prowl. It just comes off as tasteless.

Anyway, I guess I'm just making an innitiative to present myself nicely. Being pregnant isn't an excuse for me to let myself go. I still need to watch what I eat, how much water I drink, that I take my vitamins, and I don't see why I shouldn't also watch that I look nice as well. Personally, I think I look rather cute today. Just cos I'm pregnant, doesn't mean I can't wear my strappy silver wedge heels. Oddly enough, they're very comfortable.

Comfort is crucial for me. I mean, I'm sure that's why most preggos dress like slobs. Because it's comfy. But even still, I believe it's possible to look nice AND be comfy.

And on the lazy preggos. That doesn't give you a right to stop doing things. Yea, you get tired. Really tired. Like depression tired almost. You wake up for work and don't want to go, or come home from work and just want to sleep tired. None the less, don't let that kick you in the butt. Get over it. Get up. Get out and about. Wash the dishes. Make dinner. It's not a get out of jail free card for doing nothing.

Being pregnant can tire you and with the aches and pains of your body shifting shape and doing god knows what other unholy scary things, you get stressed. I've been losing gobs and gobs of hair whenever I shower or brush my hair. I don't worry about it. It grows back. That's my sign to take it easy and stop worrying. Of course when you have overbearing parents, its a little hard NOT to be stressed out. My mom seems to think that it's ok to call me at every god awful hour of the day to give me name suggestions for a child we don't even know the sex of yet! And all of her name suggestions are horrible, at that. She constantly suggests naming our child after her or my dad, completely forgetting the fact that this baby has a father who also has parents.

Another thing that stresses me out is having to hold my tongue on things. I haven't been able to tell all my friends or all my family yet because I don't want it to get back to Jesse's mom and have her find out second hand and then feel bad like we never planned on telling her or that she was the last to know. It's one of those things that IS a big deal, that you DO want to tell everyone about. And it sorta sucks and stresses me out sometimes about having to hold my forked tongue.

Anyway, I get hungry earlier. Which is fine with me. My back hurts more than I can explain. Tylenol has easily become my best friend. I greatly appreciate whenever Jesse rubs my back. It's one of those things that can lull me to sleep. And seeing as I wake up 4 to 6 times a night to pee, sleep is also greatly appreciated in my current state.

What do I miss most about my non-pregnant life? Drinking alcohol? No. I could care less. Soda? Sometimes, although I find most sodas too sweet to drink now days and they sort of repulse me. Sex? Nah. That's still good and fine. Better, even! No, the one thing I miss more than anything else in the world is my bladder control. I pee more than an old lady or a diabetic. I must go once or twice per hour at work. Fortunately, now that I'm a week away from starting the second trimester, it's getting slightly better. Slightly being the operative word. Instead of one or two times per hour its one or two times per 2 hours. That's not much progress. Besides, as I finally get used to in in 3 months, it'll only get bad again as I get to the third trimester.

Am I am emotional roller coaster? No. I mean, I don't think I am. I guess the answer to this one is more up to Jesse and those around me. My mom thinks I've actually become a little nicer. Who knows. I don't feel like my moods are all out of whack. I mean, I have emotional spurts now and then. Usually when I'm alone or in bed and have silence and time to think and reflect. Mostly anxieties. Fears about maternity leave (since my company is small and doesn't pay for it) Fears about feeding issues. How will I make it that first month? Second? Third? Fears about belly buttons falling off and circumcisions. Fears about how Lulu will react to all of this. Mostly just fear. There's no manual as to how to do everything. There's no right or wrong. It's all hit and miss. I worry that maybe I'm not doing anything right that I don't have lists of questions to take in to the doctors. That I'm just relying on my instincts to let things happen naturally and go with the flow, is that a bad thing? Will we be good parents? Will we be able to find daycare for an infant? When should I start looking? What are we going to do about a baby shower since all our friends and family are back home? How many people are going to be pestering us to be around the home 24/7 after we have the baby? Better yet, even though it's all about the baby and everything is done for the baby, at what point do I get to rest? Is it a sin that I feel like I'm carrying the weight of the world on my shoulder? Or to want to just put my feet up and take a break once in a while?

Sigh. I need some food in my tummy, STAT!

Monday, November 12, 2007


Yesterday I was going for a walk with the pug dog and I saw a bunch of houses in our neighborhood for sale. I'm guessing a lot of them bought when prices were high and can't pay for them now and are forced to forclose or sell. Either way, I was looking at some homes online this morning in our neck of the woods. I found two that rather tickled my fancy. I thought I'd post them so you LA kids could gawk at the prices. I know how you can't get a home like this in LA for under $500k. These are half the price, even less. I wouldn't mind living in either of these. Especially cos they both have fireplaces and are adorable. Plus one has really spectacular wood paneling. I guess this is one of those times I really wish I had $200k to spend on something practical. Forget the $80k wedding, I want a house!!!

Saturday, November 10, 2007


So before going to work, Jesse puts on this thing on the history channel about the history of salty snack foods. They're talking about the history of chips. Did you know they were originally served as part of your meal in fine restaurants? Hahahaha. Anyway, enough of learning about chips has got me craving some of that good fried salty stuff. I bet Jesse's gonna have chips today at work. We were both sitting there drooling wanting chips. Grrr.

Lifetime movies: more entertaining than you'd think

So, the past few weekends, I pass through channels searching for something of entertainment and I always find myself landing on Lifetime. First off, there's a huge misconception about Lifetime. People think it's some channel with shows driven towards women's needs. I think Lifetime is more like the channel of after-school-specials for adults and teens. Movie themes range from domestic violence, date violence, weird cult relationships, and so on. They start off as hokey movies. But at the end they have some sort of moral message being stated either in the form of narration, judge or other character's monologue, or what have you. They all appear to have been filmed in the mid to late 90's and have the worst writers. Dialog is wretched. Shows are like train wrecks. You can't help but want to watch them despite how horrible they are. Perhaps I'm a sucker for this kind of low level entertainment? I dunno. I just find it ridiculously amusing. I tend to laugh out loud during the "dramatic" scenes. I find them funny. The writers probably don't. They want to send out a message. Either way, maybe some woman out there watches it and thinks "all men are abusive pigs" and I sit there rooting the guy on "hit her in the face! Grab her hair and slam her against the wall!!! Throw that tea pot full of hot water at her!!!" I guess it's that same sick sense of humor I get when I root on Ike every time I watch What's Love Got To Do With It? Perhaps cos I've never been in that kinda situation and it's funny cos it's fictional and not happening to me? Who knows. Some new show is on now about someone having their child kidnapped... can't wait to see this...

Friday, November 9, 2007

Most extreme of uncoolness

So yesterday I stayed home from work cos I wasn't feeling too hot. I went and got my bloodwork done nice and early. Then I had a glimmer of feeling better for a short period so Jesse took me to breakfast at iHop. Earlier my mom called and I told her I'd call back later. Post iHop, I call back and wind up talking to her for some 3 hours. It was crazy. I find my way back to bed for a bit because the not so good feeling returns. Then it gets gnarly. Sometime around while dinner is in the oven, my stomach takes a turn for the worst. I develop this uncomfortable diarrhea. It's not like the kind where once you get it out you're good. It was the kind that lingered. It got out and then my stomach felt ok again enough to eat. But after dinner it returned. Then once again while Jesse was on the phone, and again at 1:33 in the morning. I don't want to Jinx things. It's been a long time since I've gone. But I still don't feel too hot. Ugh.

Thursday, November 8, 2007


One of my friends works for Benefit cosmetics in Macy's out here. She kept telling me that this winter they'd have an awesome line. So in a hint of down time, I decided to take a gander at their website and she was right! Their limited holiday gifts are so cool this year. Every year they have the cute palates usually revolving around one of their blushes they feature. I have the Dandelion palate from a few years ago. This year's they're featuring 10. It's a pink and bronze based palate. The thing that snagged my attenion though was the Best of Benefit beauty bag essentials containing the Dallas blush, Bad Gal mascara, and eye bright pencil. The best of Benefit iconic classics set is pretty swanky too. It also has Bad Gal mascara, but this set includes Dr. Feelgood skin mattifier and Benetint lip/cheek color. Other cool items include the Her Glossiness 6 color lip gloss set and Powder Pop! cheek colors. Anyway, Benefit is all kinds of awesome. I may need to do some holiday shopping there :)

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

How long???


This is the most interesting thing I've read in a long time. The sad thing about it, you can see it coming.

I have always heard about this democracy countdown. It is interesting to see it in print. God help us, not that we deserve it.

How Long Do We Have?

About the time our original thirteen states adopted their new constitution in 1787, Alexander Tyler, a Scottish history professor at the University of Edinburgh, had this to say about the fall of the Athenian Republic some 2,000 years earlier:

'A democracy is always temporary in nature; it simply cannot exist as a permanent form of government.'

'A democracy will continue to exist up until the time that voters discover they can vote themselves generous gifts from the public treasury.'

'From that moment on, the majority always vote for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the public treasury, with the result that every democracy will finally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, which is always followed by a dictatorship.'

'The average age of the world's greatest civilizations from the beginning of history, has been about 200 years'

'During those 200 years, those nations always progressed through the following sequence:

1. From bondage to spiritual faith;

2. From spiritual faith to great courage;

3. From courage to liberty;

4. From liberty to abundance;

5. From abundance to complacency;

6. From complacency to apathy;

7. From apathy to dependence;

8. From dependence back into bondage'
Professor Joseph Olson of Hemline University School of Law, St. Paul, Minnesota, points out some interesting facts concerning the 2000 Presidential election:

Number of States won by:
Gore: 19
Bush: 29

Square miles of land won by:
Gore: 580,000
Bush: 2,427,000

Population of counties won by:
Gore: 127 million
Bush: 143 million

Murder rate per 100,000 residents in counties won by:
Gore: 13.2
Bush: 2.1

Professor Olson adds: 'In aggregate, the map of the territory Bush won was mostly the land owned by the taxpaying citizens of this great country.
Gore's territory mostly encompassed those citizens living in government-owned tenements and living off various forms of government welfare...' Olson believes the United State s is now somewhere between the 'complacency and apathy' phase of Professor Tyler's definition of democracy, with some forty percent of the nation's population already having reached the 'governmental dependency' phase.

If Congress grants amnesty and citizenship to twenty million criminal invaders called illegal and they vote, then we can say goodbye to the USA in fewer than five years.

If you are in favor of this then delete this message if you are not then Pass this along to help everyone realize just how much is at stake, knowing that apathy is the greatest danger to our freedom.

Thanks for reading.

Ignorance breeds misconceptions

For shits and giggles, today I was google imaging random feminist stuff and came across this rather annoying little liar of an avatar:

It wants one to believe that prior to the feminist revolution, women had zero rights. They could not vote. They couldn't wear pants. They couldn't own property. And they had zero, count that, zero rights. I see this avatar and try to put myself into someone less educated shoes. Upon which I think before the feminist movement, women were nothing more than God fearing baby making machines who could only do what their husbands told them to do.

Ok, let's get something straight. Today's "feminists" think it all started in the 60's and 70's with the Frankenthalers, Shermans, and Krugers of the art world. Granted these are all the ignorant thinkers of the so called "art" scene, quick to judge, slow to reasoning. They forget that feminism started way before. Like, oh, mid 1800's for the US of A, anyhoo. And women spent many years before hand to get the right to vote. That's all they were bitching about. Because women just wanted to be able to vote.

Feminist Misconception 1: Women cannot work
Women have been working since the dawn of time. Maybe they didn't get paid the same, but why would you pay a woman what a man makes if she is not capable of outputting the same amount of work. Would you pay a woman to lift 40 lb. bags of grain to and fro several times a day if she can only haul 10 bags before getting sore when a man can do 20 or 30? I say no. It has nothing to do with unequal treatment, it has to do with facts. Until you can truly show a woman capable of doing the same work a man can do, then I say they can get the equal pay. However, women have been working in jobs, making money, hell, lots of women were even entrepreneurs owning their own brothels and making more money than some men. How's that for you ignorant feminists?

Feminist Misconception 2: Women can't wear pants
Whoever came up with this rule must also believe women can't wear shoes, shirts, or get their hair cut. This is the most ass-backward stupid feminist propaganda yet. Women have been wearing riding pants to ride horses, pants to work in the fields, even bathing suits. Sure, the pants movement might not have started till the 1800's but that's not to say it never happened. What a crock of femmeshit.

Feminism Misconception 3: Women couldn't own property
Which is why there were so many women who owned the land they lived on with their husbands after their husbands passed away. Or why women who ran brothels owned the buildings they were working out of. Or why women who's husbands went to war were allowed to stay and live in their homes and weren't kicked out onto the streets, having the government take their land away because they were women. Seriously, whoever made that little avatar makes women sound totally ignorant and stupid for believing crap like this.

Ok so back to our feminism timeline. Women get the right to vote in 1920. Whatever. Women and politics don't mix. Women think with their hearts, not with their heads. Allowing women the right to vote is like opening a can of worms and foreshadowing the decline of civilization and the birth of the bleeding heart liberals to come.

So yes, the one thing the women's rights moment has done so far is grant women the right to vote, which, obviously as time has showed us, is a bad thing. Now we have uppity women in office like that no-good Nancy Pelosi who want to take away all our rights, or that half-wit Hillary Clinton, who actually thinks she can do a man's job of running the country. Hillary, just because you can control your husband, doesn't mean you can control the country. Besides, everyone knows you'd just ruin it. And it would be like strapping a dick on your crotch, you'd have it, but you wouldn't know the first thing to do with it.

And so time progresses, women start to want to have the right to birth control. I have very mixed opinions on this issue. Innitially, if you weren't careful about sex, you'd get pregnant. Virginity was always important for brides to be. Men could screw around but you would never marry a woman who did so. It was noble to be married a virgin bride and in some cultures, they even hang your soiled bed sheet out the window after the wedding night to prove you were a virgin. Go figure. I'd think it would be more humiliating for my small town to know I got laid that night in an era of prudeness than for them to know I wasn't a virgin. None the less, women want to be sluts. Masturbation is a sin or not healthy, but sleeping around out of wedlock isn't. Go figure. People are just weird.

Anyway, with the birth control revolution comes on this whole new demoralizing of sex. Sex goes from a beautiful act between husband and wife to consumate their marriage and procreate, to some sort of wild pleasure trip. Don't get me wrong, I love sex. I also love my husband. So sex and feminism is probably one of the most taboo things because female sexuality outside of procreation has always been looked upon as negative. From the whole dressing too provocatively because doing so implies you are trying to get some to the fact that instead of being a mother and a wife you are reverting to a whore and everyone knows no one wants to marry a whore. Being sexually liberated springs on concerns that a woman may become "bored" of her husband and not stay faithful to him. She may display signs of sexual perversions the church may lable as devious. Or even worse, she might find no pleasure from the penis and be the biggest of all sexual deviants: a lesbian! Gasp! And everyone knows lesbians can't procreate and sex with them is soleley for pleasure and therefore vile!

Woah. I'm getting too out of line.

So women want a way to screw around and not get caught. Thus the birth of birth control gets popular. Sure, it's existed in weird ways for centuries from herbal remedies to working around one's menstrual cycle, but fact of the matter, a pill and condom are a lot easier to use and abuse. So the pill doesn't come around till 1960 and everything pretty much falls apart then. That's when you get the beginning of the free love crap because everyone's on the pill and hopped up on drugs and not worried about getting pregnant. Joy. Now all you have to worry about are AIDS and other STD's. Lucky!

Well, before the jolly invention of the pill, we had abortions. Those were always fun. God loves abortions. What? He doesn't? You mean, if I murder my unborn fetus from a man I have no idea who it belongs to, that's still a sin? Even though I don't want this child and can't afford to pay for it and I'm only 16?

Yes, abortions. Women could get them. Then they couldn't. Then they could again. Finally they could do it in a safe environment and not worry about those dirty coathanger abortions in a back alley somewhere. Now they could go into a hospital and pay a buttload of money and be lectured about how they're a slut and need to be careful and here's some condoms have fun and go back to being a slut. Right. Gee it's great to be a woman. I'm sure lots of women really appreciate the right to be able to murder their unborn children repetitively in order to keep having meaningless sex.

Murder must really make one's self feel real liberated. Hell, even MEN don't have the right to murder legally, but women, they have a CHOICE. Because it's their body that an unborn child reside in, they have the RIGHT to kill it. Does that mean if a man has a woman he does not want in the house he resides in, he has the right to kill her? I think not. Murder is murder either way.

Lesson learned: if you don't want to get pregnant, don't have sex. If you get pregnant and you're using birth control, maybe it's a sign. There's more to life than just sex, people. Who cares if you planned on having a kid or not. It's not really up to you to say "hey, this is in MY body, therefore I have the right to kill it."

Now, there are occasions I do feel abortions are a positive thing. That being rape and incest victims. There is no reason a woman who has been raped should have to give birth to the child of her attacker, or a girl who is a victim of incest should bring into the world some inbred child. However, those are my thoughts on abortion. If women want to murder a child they had unplanned with a boyfriend or a one night stand, ultimately, the government, who should by no means have any say in what we do in our day-to-day lives, has mandated that it is up to the woman to choose what she wants to do. Even they realized that there's a lot of open legged sluts in the world. God bless them for catering to the whores of the nation and allowing those same whores the right to vote on such issues and those same whores the right to run for office. God bless them.

Anyway, I guess my point in being is that women abuse feminism. It's not the right to be an annoying liberal slut. It's innitialy about the right to vote. Because honestly, that's the only thing women really wanted. They wanted equal rights. They had everything a man could have, except the right to vote. And the biggest misconception now is that before the 1960's and 1970's women had nothing. And that is wrong. Women had a lot. Women had great husbands and families. Women had money to go shopping. They had the right to own guns. They were able to drive cars, ride in the front of the bus, and hell, they could even be sluts if they wanted to, it was just frowned upon. Thing is, they couldn't vote. As of 1920, they could. So to all those nice little nu-feminists huffing and puffing around about rights, shut up, go home and put on a Le Tigre album and eat a pussy. Women have all they need. You're obviously of the idle rich group with nothing better to do than protest some "cause" no one really gives a shit about.

I'm not some man telling women what to do. I'm not some Christian extremist preaching the word of God. I'm just a woman. A woman who is sick of certain individuals ruining the reputation of the female species. Not all women are mouthy sluts. I'm preaching morals. I'm preaching hard work. I'm preaching dignity. I love my country, my God, my rights, and I especially love my husband. That doesn't make you better than me. Equality my ass. Your ignorance is the mother of misconception.