Monday, September 29, 2008

One year ago today...

Jesse and I got married. It wasn't huge. It wasn't fancy. But it got the job done.

You see, fate brought us together. Or so I like to think. I just remember when I first met him, I had this happy tingly feeling about him. He was such an intriguing person I knew, I just knew I had to have in my life. Friend. Confidant. Partner in crime. Anything. It was magic from the moment I told him I was looking into purchasing a little single action .22 revolver but wasn't completely sure that was the gun I wanted to get. He told me he had guns and invited me, a complete stranger, to go shooting with him one day. The offer sounded great but I felt weird so I never went. I was in a bad relationship at the time and was being convinced by that ex that I wasn't good enough for anyone else. For a long time I believed this.

A year or two passed and after relationships came and went for us with other people, we wound up talking again and I finally took him up on his shooting offer. We went out shooting one lovely Sunday and by Thursday of that week, we were together.

It's funny cos I remember so much about our pre-dating exclusive hanging out friend days, even though it maybe spanned two months, and vividly remember detail for detail the week we spent together before we started dating. I remember all the nights and hours we stayed up on the phone talking when Jesse was in school. I'm pretty sure people thought we'd break up cos a 500 mile relationship with two recently singled people wasn't going to work out, like it was just a rebound thing. However, I'm convinced those 9 months apart made us even that much closer. We got to really know each other and our relationship was tried by distance. We remained loyal to one another for 3/4 of a year until we finally decided to move in together.

Now how can two people who were friends for a few years, who dated for 3 months, and then spent 9 months 500 miles apart just move in together. Technically we were still very much strangers. But it worked out. As I said before, I'm convinced we were just destined to be together. He's like iron sights to my rifle. I could have some flashy aftermarket optics, but instead I am a better marksman with that which was originally designed to work for me. He's always reliable, and never lets me down. He makes me a better person. Maybe we're just nerdy enough for one another in ways no one else would really understand but at the same time agree they couldn't see it any other way.

Anyway, long story short, a year ago today, we got married. We shot machine guns. We found $20 on the floor. We didn't hawk ourselves up in debt for some fancy pants blatant display of how much money we're willing to throw away. Instead, we just were happy and content with our little gold wedding bands, courthouse wedding, and machine gun shoot. Just as we were happy with a simple day of fun then, we will follow up a year later with a simple night of fun. Dinner and some bowling. Possibly go-karts.

So on that note, I end this saying I love Jesse more than words could ever say. He's the one person who truly gets me in life. We finish each other's sentences. We laugh at the same jokes. He's held my hair when I had to puke and rubs my tummy when it aches. He washes dishes when I feel tired and doesn't complain if I don't feel up to doing things. He doesn't complain about having to haul me around places. He smiles at me at random and tells me I look cute just because. He goes to sleep facing one way and will roll over to hold me when he thinks I'm asleep. But I always notice it and smile with my eyes shut. He buys me strawberries in the summer for no reason other than he knows how much I love them. He'll rub my feet when he thinks I look like I had a hard day. He draws me baths and dries me off when I get out. He kisses me every day before he goes to work, when he gets home, and before we go to bed and makes sure to tell me he loves me just as often. He doesn't care about people thinking he might look like a pussy and ends every phone call with "I love you" even if he's at work or in front of his guy friends. If I fall asleep on the couch, instead of putting a blanket on me, he will wake me up and help me to bed, including putting on my jammies and tucking me in. He will even go as far as fixing the bed for me if it hasn't been fixed because he knows I can't sleep in a bed that hasn't been fixed. Basically we know each other's quirks. Instead of picking on them, we work with them. Yes, he is the perfect man for me. And the best part is, I get to spend the rest of my life with him! Some people thought we deserved each other, as if it were a bad thing. I think I am lucky to deserve someone as wonderful as him. It just makes me think I'm such a good person I get someone as fantastic as Jesse. I love my booger husband and look forward to several happy years with him, Charlie, and Lulu.

Anniversary and Airport Security

I was running late for my flight home today. My mom dropped me off at the terminal about 20 minutes before my flight. I checked in with security because you have to check in where you do baggage checking if you fly with a child to verify their presence and age and get a non-ticketed boarding pass. Anyway, I was told to go left. For those of you who have never been to the Burbank Airport, myself included, you can only go one of two ways. Left or right. You go either way and go through security and wait at the end for your plane. So I go left and go through security. It was pretty quick. I walk past all that ruckus and get to the end of the terminal to Alaskan Airlines. Nowhere is Southwest to be found. I ask the lady at Alaskan thinking I missed it because now I have 15 minutes before my plane leaves. Boarding has already begun. She freaks out. I'm confused like I won't make it but then learn I need to go back to security because I should be on the other side and then the security manager is barking at me to see my ticket and asking me like who signed off on it and I just point to the guy who has his little magnifying glass who marked my ticket and Charlie's boarding pass that all info was correct and let us through! Next thing I know he's getting his ass chewed out. Yeah, after that little September 11th thing, airport security is a big deal and even something as petty as wrong terminal is a huge issue because if he wasn't paying attention to that, what else is he not paying attention to, right? Anyway, security then escorts me to the other side where I am now close to 5 minutes to take off. I have to go BACK through security. Take in mind I am traveling with a kid alone. This means putting my carry on items through the x-ray machine, the stroller, the car seat, and me and Charlie walking through the metal detector. Pain in the ass. I get to do it twice in 5 minutes. The security officer pages Southwest and lets them know that I was misinformed by airport staff to where to go and I'm on my way. See, they were gonna cover me to take another flight but all other flights for the day had connecting flights. I'm ok with my layover flight but I was NOT going to get on another plane with all my crap. I was furious when they told me that and started to get a little sceney. There was a non-stop flight later in the day they would get me on but that was at 7 and there was no way in hell I was gonna miss my anniversary. All I can say is there would have had to been some MAJOR compensation if I did not get on that plane. But I made it and I lucked out cos it was a pretty empty flight so they let me take the carseat on. Let me just say that in future events if given this option, I am doing lap child as it is a million times easier!

OK, so I get home in time. Jesse and I check out Scheels, the new sporting goods store that opened in Sparks. That place is awesome but I guess there was some Scheels propaganda vandalism in the Sportsman's Warehouse bathroom today so that's not cool. I'm not gonna go into it in depth regarding how it's a cool store, it's huge, has two amazing aquarium arch walk ways and they out-goated Cabellas with their goat and mountain critter display. Plus they have this weird thing which is a display of great presidents and it's pretty f'ing creepy. The best part is they have a fudge shop. I love fudge. I got some cos I couldn't help myself.

After that, we get home and I straighten up the house a bit while Jesse showers and shaves. Then I shower and get ready. Holly came over. She's this girl Jesse works with and Charlie and Lulu seemed to both dig her a lot so I'm glad that worked out. Anyway, Jesse and I were gonna do Marie Calendars and then bowl and play pool at Wild Island. Our plans changed. Instead we went to Outback Steakhouse cos I've never been there. For what it would cost us in time and gas to drive to one end of Reno, then out to Sparks, we figured why not splurge. Heck, it's our anniversary. Go ahead and get a Pepsi. Hehe. Anyway, Jesse got some sort of plate that had all this different stuff and I got a prime rib. It was yum. Then we went to Wild Island. We started out with a round of go-karts. Husband vs. Wife. I started out ahead but Jesse totally beat me in the end. The second round was Teagues vs. Random Family. Jesse totally owned on kids half his age. I passed up one kid and got stuck behind Michael McDonald and his kids. I just couldn't get past them to save my life. That was super fun. Then we went inside and did the Halford Bowling. That's the bowling on the small lane with the balls that are like the size of grapefruits. The backdrop looks like the cover of some Halford album according to Jesse, and if you ask me, it reminds me of the desert background in the Turbo Lover video. After two games there, we went to regular bowling. For some reason, we got lucky and were placed in the bowling garage where they were doing the crazy bowling with blacklights and neon balls. There was another family a few lanes over but they left and then it was just me and Jesse. So we had the whole bowling garage to ourselves. We only played one game cos the place was gonna close in about half an hour and we didn't wanna be the lame customers who keep everyone waiting.

Anyway, our anniversary was nice. Totally fun. Random and goofy just like us. And we had the classiest of outfits so everyone was jealous they weren't us. The end.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Homesick

I've reached that point in the week where I miss my home dearly. I am so exhausted and my body hurts and I'm tired and want to be in my own bed or my own living room. Most of all, I want to be with my husband and pug dog. Its nice being down here with friends and family but this is no longer my home. I am a visitor and don't feel at home or comfortable. I miss my comforts of home. I miss going to bed next to Jesse. I miss Lulu sunning herself in the morning at the end of the bed. I look forward to seeing them again Monday.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

I should have known this was going to take a turn for the worst...

Yesterday Lori had to go to Rite Aid. We were there looking at hair dye and then the Burts Bees stuff. A guy comes up to me and says, "Excuse me, has anyone ever told you that you look like that one chick?" Yeah. I look like that one chick. WHICH ONE!? "You know, that one, with Will Ferrel, on Saturday Night Live?"

Oh. "You mean Mary Catherine Gallagher?" I ask.

"Yeah! That one. You look like her! Do you get that a lot?"

"I've got it before."

Geez. Shoot me. I walk off away from him and he keeps following talking to me.

"Do you like her?"

"She's funny, yeah."

The guy then looks at Charlie and says, "Is that your baby?"

No shit, Sherlock. I'm walking around with him, he probably has to be, right? "Yes."

"How old is he?"

"Four and a half months." I say.

"Is he pretty good?"

"He gets fussy around this time of day so I gotta hurry and get my shopping done before he gets too cranky." Hopefully he'll take a hint and leave.

He does. He looks at Lori and does some sort of finger pointing motioning back and forth between Lori and me. "So are you guys... friends? Sisters?"

"We're sisters," I tell him.

Things then take a tragic turn for the worst and after about five minutes of annoying me with dumb questions, he gets to where he was going, "Does she have a husband or boyf---" and before he can even finish his sentence, I cut him off and tell him, "Boyfriend. She has a boyfriend. They just moved out together."

I proceed to walk off as he was obviously burned.

I have been away from LA way too long as my lame attempts at a pickup radar has been blown off so bad. I'm used to random strangers talking to me and not trying to get into someone's pants. I feel so naive. Seriously, though, what was homeboy thinking? He straight up looked like he was unemployed or something and is trying to hit on a girl at a drugstore? He was straight up cruising the cosmetics section for women! Does that actually work?! And did he really think telling me I look like a character on a SNL skit who is supposed to be socially inept is a good way to start a conversation?! I mean, seriously? That's like telling someone they look like Stuart on Mad TV!!! Tell me I look like Molly Shannon I can laugh and say ok, but specifically Mary Catherine Gallagher?!? And using that as an ice breaker to find out of about my sister!? Talk about horrifically wrong. Maybe that technique works on fifteen year old girls but not us.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Ozzy just doesn’t cut it.

Way to follow up Holy Diver with a suck vidja today Metal Mania. Let's be ironic and play Mama I'm Coming Home after Dio. Good thing Ozzy was second after Dio cos there's no way in hell he would ever be better than him. Ever. Seriously, could Ozzy fight off evil in a church? NO. Not even close! Could Ozzy be man enough to say he feels like a rainbow in the dark? NO. He'd hafta get Sharon's permission or something to say so if he could even ask her in his drug-induced state. My point, Ozzy is lame. The only people who like Ozzy seem to also require a bowl of weed with each meal, or in substitution to their meal followed by some Funions. I like Dio cos he totally reminds me of like old Catholic art where they show all the horrible things that will happen to you if you don't worship Jesus. Plus his videos are way cooler than anything Ozzy could muster up. Not to mention his singing is way better. SO, on that note, I end saying Ozzy sucks ass chunks while Dio rules balls. The end. Don't even try to defend Ozzy cos he's ass. Period. Sabbath was better with Dio. Hands down.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Blogivizing: Solids/Naps/Anniversary

1. Charlie has been starting solid foods. Today he got to have avocado. He liked it a lot. More than plums, which he had last week. He has been eating a little bit of rice cereal and a fruit or veggie for dinner. Ever since he's started solids, his spit up has really decreased greatly. I told Jesse this. Two seconds later, I was covered in spit up. Oh the irony.2. Now that Charlie is older, nap time is a little harder. Before it was pretty easy. I could feed him and put him in bed and he'd sleep till he had to eat again. Now, I feed him, we play for a bit and then I put him down for his nap. Usually he doesn't want to go to sleep. So I have to create this new nap time ritual. It starts with closing the blinds and bedroom door to make it dark. Then put on some soft music. Then a swaddle. I will start out with holding Charlie up over my shoulder in a burping manner and sway back and forth. As he starts to doze, I then hold him in a cradle manner, continuing the sway. As he shuts his eyes or after his eyes are shut, I will sit in the glider and rock for another 5 - 15 minutes or longer depending on how comfortable I am. After that, I will put him in his crib, where he tends to sleep pretty good. Sometimes I make up random songs to put him to sleep. It used to be the swaddle bug song (It's the swaddle buuuuug.... swaaaaadle buuuuggg...Little swaddle buuuuuggg... swaaaaaddddlllllleeeee buuuuuugggg.... over and over.) Now it's the new swaddle bug song (Charlie is a swaddle bug... swaddled in his little rug... With his binky swaddle bug... Charlie is the swaddle bug. Charlie's sister is a pug.... Lulu is a crazy pug.... With her ball and her butt up.... Lulu is a crazy pug... followed by constant humming of the same thing over and over and over till I hear it so much in my head I can't even remember the tune.)

3. On September 29, 2008, Jesse and I will be celebrating our one year wedding anniversary. I will be coming home from LA and greeted by my husband in the airport one year from the date we were joined in marriage. It saddens me that I will not be able to wake up next to him that day and make him breakfast as he sleeps in and greet him with a kiss and a "Happy Anniversary" salutation. None the less, we will go out in the evening just the two of us. It's so weird to think we have been married for a year already. It seems like just yesterday that we started dating. I can't even remember how long ago it was that we first met. But it seems so short, the time we've been together. I'll admit, it saddens me sometimes that we didn't have much alone time together before we got married. It just seems like 3 months we had to each other with money, having fun and being crazy. Driving around the streets of Palmdale in Jolly Green or trekking out to the range in Jeepie. Then he went to Susanville for almost a year. And then at the end of that year we decided to move to Reno. We lived here enjoying each other alone and struggling and just as we got on our feet and were able to have fun I got pregnant and so we were restricted to things I could do. Well, I was anyway. Jesse didn't have to worry about not being able to have a beer or ride go-karts. And then I had Charlie. I guess we just had life thrown at us pretty quickly. I just get sad sometimes cos we didn't get to date. We just wound up in a full fledge relationship. I think it was cos we didn't really need to date. We knew each other. We were friends. We didn't hafta waste time trying to impress one another. We knew we were happy and it would work and it did... and does. But I remember when we moved out here I told Jesse of all the things I wanted to do and he had promised me that when we got on our feet financially, we would do those things. What were those things? Well, random things. Like I always wanted to go on a dinner train. Or wine tasting. I've never been to a fancy restaurant. I just wanted to experience things he has done on past dates with others. Granted, I'm a simple creature with simple needs. I am more than content going somewhere basic. I can go to Wienershnitzel after a day shooting and be more than happy. But I'd also like to be treated the way others have been in attempts to woo. Just because I already love him doesn't mean he doesn't have to try to impress me. Wrongly stated. I guess what I'm trying to say is, just because I love him and he doesn't need to do anything elaborate to try to get me to love him, doesn't mean that he shouldn't do it. I mean, why should we not do something fancy just because we're married. I feel like he bought the cow and I dunno. I'd like some sort of gesture of grandeur once in a while. I have never had anyone do anything spectacular for me and I guess I'd just like to know what it's like to be swept off my feet. I just feel like I do things, even if they're little things, to surprise Jesse and make him happy. Little random presents. A special dinner. Anything I can do in my powers. I don't even know where I'm going with this, I've got so lost in trying to figure out what I'm trying to say. Long story short, we never went on dates or did anything in the traditional date sense. We were gonna do it when we got the money and then we couldn't cos I got pregnant. And now we're back at square one being a financial train wreck.

But enough of that.

I love Jesse. It's funny cos I feel like I have become so much more empowered by being with him (or by owning more guns, I'm not sure which, maybe a combo of both?) Sometimes I wonder what would have happened to me if Jesse never came into my life. He was one of those people who I really only saw whenever we'd do things with a group of friends. He became more prevalent in my life during an ugly period and for lack of a better word, rescued me from the shipwreck relationship I was in. I feel like if he never would have made himself so available at that time, Lord only knows what would have happened to me. I just think I would be working in the same job doing the same thing, being miserable, in a go-nowhere relationship and just hating life each and each day. Instead, I am now in a loving relationship, with a wonderful husband and son and pug dog. We don't have money, but we have each other and our happiness. We struggle but it makes everything in life more worth while. We appreciate everything we have, most of all, that we have each other.

I find it hard to believe sometimes at how fast everything happened for us. I just think back to the one time we were at Metal Skool after we started dating and we were discussing when we should get married. Granted this was only a few days after we became a couple. It was just one of those things we knew would happen one day. How only a few months after a year of us dating we did get married. And then a few months later we had our son. Perhaps I dwell on our past too much, but how could I not? With the wonderful memories we have, it is hard to not think about it and dream of what the future has in store for us.

That year mark is almost upon us. So now I can only think of how I will look forward to our next anniversary and the one after that and so on till we're old and grey and wrinkled. And then when the time comes, I should hope we are burried side by side, with our favorite guns. All together, just as we lived.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Miso Wrong!!!

So today I went to Radioshack to get a new turntable cos they had one on sale there. Anyway, I figure whilst in that area I'll get lunch. Now I thought I recalled seeing Miso Soup on the menu at this place, Viet Pho. I had a taste for that and I go in there. I'm staring at the menu, which is like looking at a novel up on the wall with random pictures. There's so much in such a small place it's way overwhelming. The guy working there is on the phone and hangs up at the sight of a customer, me, who isn't even sure I want to eat there unless I can find the miso soup. I ask the guy, "Do you guys have miso soup?"

Wow, you would have thought I was a US soldier walking into Vietcong turf asking if they had any napalm I could use.

Seriously. The guy was pissed. He was like, "WE NO HAVE MISO!!! MISO JAPANESE!!! WE VIETNAMESE!!! WE SERVE PHO!!! PHO!!! IT NOODLE SOUP!!! WE NO HAVE MISO!!! YOU WANT SUSHI, YOU GET MISO!!! YOU WANT PHO, WE HAVE PHO, WE NO HAVE MISO!!!"

I swear he was yelling this at me and I must have been shaking in my skin or something. He was so scary and the weird thing was I had a .38 and was separated from him by a counter and he was like half my size and twice my age so I had no reason to be afraid of him... but I was. Anyway, he then goes to tell me things I might like if I wanted miso. I wind up getting a wonton soup and he asks if I want the wonton soup with Pho or without. Without.

OK, seriously, how the hell was I supposed to know Vietnamese don't have miso? I just see some sort of Asian place and automatically assume they have the same shit just a variation of it. I felt like such a retard. But the worst part was he totally scared me into ordering from their place! I didn't want to get anything but I was suckered (read: scared) into getting wonton soup. Oh well.

So while I'm eating a Tactical Ted comes in and goes to Port of Subs and I'm thinking in my head a mental scenario of Tactical Ted saying to the Port of Subs gal, "Can I get a 1911 in .45 ACP? Well what do you mean you don't have 1911s!? What do you mean you only serve sandwiches!? What kind of place is this!?" (storms out in a huffy puff fit.)

*snicker*

I guess I've become accustomed to hearing too many of Jesse's tales from work.

Speaking of, after I went to Radioshack, the guy who I spoke to on the phone in the morning walks out and holds the door for me. I get my stuff together and see him walking back in with a gun case. I ask him if he's got a rifle in there and he says yea its an AR-15 he just got and I told him if he ever needs a gunsmith to call Jesse and I give him Jesse's card. We then small talk and he says he has a .22 that needs some work and apparently he has met Jesse yesterday while looking for a scope and yeah. Small world, huh?

The day gets stranger. On my way home I have this young gal about my age ask me for help in directions. She looks just like Katrina's sister. Like WAY just like her. I guess her and her husband are moving out here on the 1st and she needed to know how to get back to the strip. We get to talking for God knows how long and exchange numbers. She seems like a nice gal so I hope she moves to our neighborhood. It will be nice to have some nice people here. I told her she looks like Elizabeth and what a trip it was to talk to her cos I kept thinking of Elizabeth the whole time. It was so crazy.

Anyway, I got home and got the turntable set up and I'm listening to some of the old records now. I didn't realize how much records we have between the two of us but there isn't much room for them all. I have a lot of weird crap on vinyl aside from good stuff. But yeah, I enjoy listening to my old weird crap. Like all my old honky tonk and classical and random stuff :)

Good times. Perhaps I should make something to snack on. That wonton isn't cutting it right now.

Monday, September 15, 2008

R.I.P. Wienershnitsel

A few days ago Jesse and I were driving down Mill St. and noticed one of our absolute favorite places for crappy fast food has been replaced. Our beloved Wienershnitzel has been replaced by some place called "Rosies". WHAT THE HELL!? So now we have ABSOLUTELY NOWHERE to go to get a pretzel dog or chili cheese dog to their standards. I feel like a part of my soul has been taken from me. Their website lies and says it still exists there. I feel so betrayed and lonely. I want a chili cheese dog and I will never get one again.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Idiocracy: It’s happening.

Well, it all starts watching COPS on G4. It's a classic 80's episode. There's these two black cops in Buffalo, NY and one dude has a flat top and gold chain, the other dude has these killer glasses that wrap around his head and look like the kind you get after you get your eyes dilated at the optometrist. Anyway, they go to a house where there's a decomposing body in the yard and can't do anything till homicide comes. So they go out and check a call on a snake. "We got a call they's a boa constructor in a driveway so we gonna check it out." He called the snake a boa "constructor". Jesse thought he heard him say "boat constructor" and was like, "Why are they gonna arrest some dude building a boat in his driveway?" So they get to the house and there's these three dudes talking about the snake in the driveway and it went into some house upstairs. The cop goes in and is talking about how they can keep the snake as a pet or something, expecting to see a little snake. Instead, in the attic, we find a box for a Commidor 64 and what looks like a Burmese Python. Definitely not a boa "constructor". Anyway, the cop goes to grab the snake and it strikes at him and he jumps back. The camera man pans on his partner, who is running down the stairs out of the room like a little girl. That was probably the best part. Anyway, animal control comes out and they get the snake. The end.

So here's the moment of stupidity.

There's a commercial for a new episode of "Hurl". Yeah, apparently, it claims itself to be the show that tests the "ultimate gag reflex." Wait a minute, let me get this straight: you have a show about how much it takes to get someone to barf? What the hell!? Yeah, so the commercial shows these gross edible concoctions and then people doing outlandish things like spinning machine things and bungee rides. Hang on. I thought all had come to an end when MTV created the show I Love Money which basically tested what extent people will sell out for money, but Hurl, this is a new low by far. I'm confused. Like the person who can take the most gross food and physical challenges and barf last wins or what? Or is it the person who barfs the most the quickest? Is that legal? Or safe? I mean, you're making someone intentionally sick. Is it stuff like rotten food and paint they're eating or what? I mean, they might as well be.

On a tangent that can somehow tie in to this: I watched Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay yesterday per my nephews' requests. They swear by it being the greatest show ever. I watched both shows. White Castle, meh. OK. Guantanamo Bay, funnier. But both were completely stupid. Don't get me wrong, I like a dumb comedy once in a while but these hit a new low. For starters, they have bastardized my Doogie Howser, MD. My little Neil Patrick Harris, the innocent child genius doctor, is portrayed as some druggie sex-crazed maniac. I was nearly in tears at my Doogie acting the way he did. I mean, what would his mom and dad say? Or Vinnie? I mean, Vinnie, I could expect that behavior from, but no way Doogie! But yeah, this mentality of shows like Hurl, come from the same mentality of H&K (the stoners, not the gun manufacturers) who want to create a smokeless bong so you can get high on a plane. Seriously? Are drugs that important to people? Why not just make some pot brownies or something. You could get those through security. You can take in a sandwich, just nothing liquid over 3 oz. or frozen stuff. But security loopholes aside, it's just sad. Yeah, OK, I get it. Because they're such pot heads they wind up having stupid adventures. I laughed a few times but I'm over the age of 18 and I think I need a little more substance in life to entertain me outside of druggie slapstick.

I dunno. I just feel like these "male oriented" TV channels and movies totally undermine the intelligence levels of men. Give guys a little more credit than that, you know? Yeah, there's a handful of idiot frat boys who are probably psyched about a new episode of Hurl being on tonight, but on the other hand, there's a lot of normal guys who could care less about watching someone barf from eating gross shit. I guess that's just the mentality of boobs that are spawned from Howard Sternesque idiocracy, where the most absurd, mass quantities of tits, and ultimate brainless stupidity somehow equals quality entertainment. And I keep questioning why Cinemax is starting to show less movies and more episodes of Coed Confidential...

Friday, September 5, 2008

I did something today I haven’t done in over a year...

I put on a tampon. Ugh. I fed the boy. I peed after as always. I felt gassy and just crampy and noticed that my period came back. I reached into the back of the cabinet under the sink and found my old tampons, right where I left them. I dusted one off and put it on and made a point to mark on the calendar this time when I got my period. No more casual sex. Now we gotta work around the period. Now I'm ovulating again so there's that fear of getting pregnant again. At the same time there's that sense of relief that I'm not pregnant from all the sex we've been having. Looks like I gotta break down and spend that $500 for Mirena or something. Ugh. Maybe Jesse's new insurance will cover it? I dunno I gotta look into it. I do NOT want to get pregnant again. I regret not getting my tubes tied when I had my c-section.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

A pleasant surprise!

Today was the start of another frustrating day. Charlie woke up earlier than usual, fussier than usual, and wanting to eat every 2 hours this morning. I finally got him to take a nap between feedings around 9 am and my mom called. Shortly after my sister called. Then while I was on the phone with her I get another call from Casey, an old coworker from the RPA days. She asked how I was doing and what I was up to and then followed up with "Do you wanna meet up?" Apparently, she went to Burning Man and came back and was staying in Reno on the strip. I was so excited! So we actually walked and met up with each other half way. I got lunch and we talked. Then we went back to my apartment and her and her man Keith "Kraut" met Lulu. After that we walked around my neighborhood looking for a nail salon. They treated me to a mani-pedi and we all sat around and had our nails done and then came home. Jesse took them back to their hotel cos they had to get on the road. Anyway it was so cool to see someone I haven't seen in like at least 2 or 3 years. Heck, it was nice to see one of my friends up here. The only time I've seen people I know is if I went to work or go back down to LA. So I had a good day. Oh and I found a dollar on the floor!

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

I hate bankers reason 3: The Straw That Broke The Camel’s Back

I hate bankers. I think they are the scuzziest most evil people in the world. They are slimy enough to give high school kids credit cards. Put holds on your payroll checks for weeks at a time. And now, they also have crappy customer service.

Last Friday, someone got access to my bank card number and was making small transactions online with my card and proper name and address, but using a different phone number and email address. The sites they were making transactions with were with "incentive" websites, like, get so many people to sign up for this and that get a free iPod etc. (That's what one of the companies the person ordered from told me.) Anyway, long story short, I canceled my debit card and reported it as stolen and I'm waiting for a new one.

Meanwhile, our rent is due. Jesse's check was small and he was short and we're waiting on my unemployment check to come in. Because of the stupid holiday yesterday, I didn't get it till today. Not a big deal. Except it came in like around 4:30. I had to walk to the bank to deposit that check, along with Jesse's money, so I could pay rent. I had just mailed off the cable bill, electricity, and Jesse's car insurance. So it kinda matters that this money gets deposited.

Well, I get to the bank at 5:05. The bank closes at 5:00. There are still tellers working. There's two or three people in line. The door is unlocked, but the second door is locked. I get in and I ask if I can deposit my check. Take in mind, this is JUST A DEPOSIT. Nothing fancy. A straight deposit. A girl comes to the door and unlocks it. OH THANK GOD! They're letting me in! Whew! No. She tells me that they are closed. I tell her that I had just walked down there in the heat and ask her, beg her even, if she can let me deposit my check. She say no. They are closing out their drawers. What about the two people in line that are waiting to do their transactions. Is it really gonna kill them to have ONE MORE PERSON to deal with with a simple straight transaction!? To answer that question, yes. The girl says I can deposit in the atm and I tell her I do not have a bank card, mine has been stolen, I need to deposit via a person. She tells me that I can go to their drive through teller if that's the case and just present them with my ID.

Fine. Lazy cunt.

Anyway, I go to the drive through teller. I wait for what seems like forever behind a car of scumbags. Finally I get to the teller. I put my deposit in the little thing and the girl tells me, "Ma'am, I'm sorry but you can't come here unless you're in a car. It's for your safety."

I tell her I don't have a car.

"Ma'am, if you'd just go to your car and come back here, I'd be happy to help you. It's for your safety."

I proceed to yell at her that I do not have a car as she is on the verge of saying the same thing for the third time. By this point I am in tears, hysterical and yelling at her, and two seconds away from asking, "Ma'am, which car is your car in the parking lot?" and pointing a .38 at it and shooting it and telling her, "Now we're in the same position, would you like to help me?" Ah, to be imaginative...

Anyway, this whole experience was completely humiliating to me. I don't have a car. I'm unemployed. All I ask is for two minutes of someone's time which they won't give me. Then I am degraded by some drive-thru teller who makes me feel like some worthless piece of crap because I don't have a car. Sorry, but not everyone has a car.

I am so furious because I know when I used to work retail, there were so many times I'd stay late for that one last customer who got there just in the nick of time. And this wasn't on any special occasion, this was just cos I was cool like that. I felt for people. But these stupid little bitches working behind the glass safety wall don't have that compassion for others. All they care about is that they get their pay checks and can get their hair and nails done and drive around in their fancy pants cars and live in their nice houses in safe neighborhoods, while my ass is praying to God that someone will deposit my check so I don't hafta walk back home to my ghetto with my baby in the heat and pray I don't get mugged and lose my rent money.

FUCK YOU BANKERS!!! FUCK YOU LITTLE CUNTS!!! YOU'RE ALL A BUNCH OF SCUMBAGS WHO WANT MY MONEY!!! I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!!! WHEN THE REVOLUTION COMES, YOU WILL BE ON MY LIST!!!

OK, I'm sorry if I scared anyone. I just had to vent for a second there. I'm still feeling all slimy. Seriously, I'm a good person. I did no wrong. I just wanted to deposit my money. Instead I am treated like some sort of lower-than-thine-holy-teller-skanks. All I can say is, any banker I see, I won't hesitate to take out your knee caps if I don't have my baby with me. If there's one thing we've all learned from nature, you don't fuck with Mothers.

FYI, I did file a formal complaint against this situation with Wells Fargo. I'm sick of people and their shitty customer service. I hate dealing with people but I never treated people like they were shit because they relied on me and needed me to get things done. I never took a God role whilst in customer service. So screw you Wells Fargo girls. I hope you get fired and your trips to Cancun get canceled or something cos you can't afford to pay for it or you lose your car or your fancy house and know what it's like to hafta be poor for once in your life!!!

Monday, September 1, 2008

Fanta Detergent

You know, there's just some things in this world I don't understand. This is one of them:


OK, obviously, you had money to buy the laundry detergent, which came in a container. I mean, it doesn't just come in a vat and you collect it in a bottle like the water dispenser machines outside of grocery stores. Maybe they were out of detergent and borrowed some from their neighbor? But still, there was like enough for a whole bottle of detergent in that thing, so why not just take the whole bottle and pay them back or something? Was this some sort of miracle home-made detergent from dish washing soap, baking soda, and water or something? I'm completely baffled on this one. Can someone explain this to me please?