Friday, March 27, 2009

Apalachian Uh-oh


I've learned the cheapest groceries are at Walmart on Thursdays as that's when they get their new products in and the best time to go is in the evening. I usually head out around 9:00ish and get out by 10:00. For whatever odd reason, it took me a ridiculously long time to get my shopping done but I was in for a treat in line! In front of me was your average run of the mill white trash family of 5. Mom and dad trying to be hip but just looking like last Sears last season scum, their two bratty daughters, which the older of the two, who looked like a scrawny 11 year old or old looking 9 year old, was perched on the handle bars of the shopping cart with her feet resting on the kiddie seat while the younger sister observed in complaint that she didn't know why the older sister always gets to sit in the baby seat when both girls were obviously way too old to be sitting in there, and of course, the brother, who had his hair shaved at about a 1 or 2 with a 5" mullet that got really curly on the bottom. It was the most God-awful sight. Take in mind when I see these cretins in line, it's now 10:45 PM. On a Thursday night. I'm alone doing my shopping for the weeks. My son is in bed sleeping. My husband is watching him. They're out as a family. The contents of their cart include a 30 lb bag of dog food, milk, bread, and donuts. Mom says in her hick accent, "Whut else was we s'posed to get 'sides brid in do'nuts?" Seriously? What on God's green earth made you have to get donuts and bread this late at night? There wasn't any special sale on them. It's not like it couldn't wait till tomorrow to get or they couldn't have got it earlier in the day. Why now? Why donuts? There's just so much logic missing in this scenario. I was oh so amused though. I still can't get over this! In the wise words of Chaz Michael Michaels, "It's mind-bottling. Like your mind is trapped in a bottle..." *snort*

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