Thursday, June 10, 2010

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

There comes a time in every relationship where you need to sit down and carefully look at what is going on. Is there hope? Is there a future? Are you just wasting away? Sadly, after putting in a new heater core and realizing that didn't fix the major problems with the Oldsmobile, and talking with the mechanics, I've come to the grave conclusion the Oldsmobile is done for. Not for good, but for me. We had a good run but our relationship isn't healthy. I put all this work into it and get nothing out of it and I feel worn and tired. My heart is broken being with a car that loves me as much as I love him. So it is with a heavy heart I said today, I broke up with my car. Here's what I had to say to him:

Oldsmobile, I think it's time we go our separate ways. It's not you, it's me... Oh, who am I kidding!? Of course it's you! I did all this nice shit for you and what do you do!? You crap out on me! You do this all the time! Like when we went to LA and you died in Sacramento before that snow storm? Or like when you over heated out at Derby Dam on not one but several occasions. And now you're smoking behind my back!? Are you kidding me!? I totally feel like you don't care about me at all and I'm done. I'm done spending all this money on you just for you to get all hot and bothered and not want to go anywhere or work. You're a lazy bum. I hope whoever you wind up with next realizes how much of an asshole you are and I hope if they give you all their money you at least treat them nice. More than I can say you did for me. But who am I trying to kid? I got you knowing you were a piece of crap thinking I could change you and shame on me. Hopefully next time I won't wind up with a loser. But you know what Oldsmobile? I'd rather be without a car than with a piece of crap! So screw you Oldsmobile! I'm done with you!

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